Happy Bday, recap

So yesterday was my birthday, I am now an old ag of 26, I have one more year. All the greats have died at 27, and I am pretty fucking great! SO yesterday was the worst bday I have had in like 5 years. Lets recap shall we, since I just finished a test and have some time to kill.
18- I got wasted on scotch an English bloke brought from scotland and my son was conceived... Both good and bad, I love my son to death but it also caused me to marry and bitch and have her later take him and all my stuff!
19, 20- I don't remember I am pretty sure nothing extravagant happened since I was married 19 was right after September 11 and then I signed up for the Navy.
21- Sucked ass! Was still married. I remember getting a bottle of Jim Beam at like 7am, and going to that big ass mall in VA with the mideval times. Its like a couple miles long and walking around to buy stuff for my wife and kid, I think I got a DVD for myself and I kept going out to the van to take swigs of my bottle.
22- In San Antonio, last day, free day after our excericse, which meant party time! At the Wild Zebra strip club! Got a bunch of free drinks and got pulled on stage and a lap dance from 3 girls. Bad part was they stripped me down to my boxers in front of a bunch of people I worked with who didn't need to witness it. And then they spanked me with my belt which I kinda liked until she caught my balls!
23- I don't know if you call it fun exactly but it was interesting. Got off work, went home and pounded some Jim Beam(starting to see a pattern here) and Chris and Mike came with their women to take me out to eat at TGI Fridays. One the way there I was screaming some Silverstein and waving my middle finger out the window when some douchebags thought I was doing it to them, they started talking shit and threw pennies at me. So my dumbass pulled my knife out and made the motion of slicing my throat to them, they chased us and we had to go on base to lose them.
24- With HB a relaxing getaway to a bed and breakfast equipped with a massage and a hot tub in the room! It was pretty cold since it was in the mountains but still a great trip. We went and saw Jackass 2, I almost pissed my pants.
25- The kegger where I almost got my ass beat and was wasted! I ended up slicing the shit out of my thumb and never quite solving the mysetery of how it happened.
26- This year I was stuck at school from 8-230, I did work out a bit at lunch time instead of eating. Then go to work from 3-10. A couple of my friends were going to hang out at the Bowling Alley so I did go out and get a couple Beam and cokes and played some pool. It wasn't a bad time it just sucked about school and work. And I had to be here at school by 8am for class and a test!
So thats my past bdays, I am pretty sure the last 3 maybe 4 years are on here if you check the archives.... But that is all for now. Still waiting on my money and pissed about that but don't have time to get into it, Have to get back to class...Peace!