Review of Ohio

Let's start at the beginning. So I left around 130 on Thursday. I made a nice mix of Senses Fail and some songs from Headbangers ball before I left work, so I put that in and rolled down the windows and took off screaming to my tunes. By time I was half way out of Maryland I noticed that I was on autopilot and my mind was blank. I don't think I've ever actually felt that way before. It was a nice meditation, wind in my face, my kind of music cranked up, just driving to what felt like no where. I realized that I forgot my notebook to write in and kind of got mad at myself but oh well. The air was very hot and muggy though. Through the mountains of Penn the clouds gathered and the wind became a nice cool breeze. That was heaven until the downpour. People were pulling over and stopping while I drove by them keeping between 60 and 70 to be on the safe side. Then the rain stopped and it was perfect again. The last toll booth in Penn, where you have to pay 1.50 for some reason after you already tuned in your ticket and payed 5 miles ago, had the most beautiful woman ever to grace a toll booth. I was in shock. I already had my money ready expecting to see the old person who usually work in them, my music still cranked, a cigarette hanging in my mouth. I drive up and hand her the money, got ready to gun it and looked at her, my mouth dropped to a half shocked smile, she smiled and said thank you. I wanted to say something but you know it's a toll booth, so I drove off thinking "what the hell is a chic like that working here?" But kept driving, got to my town around 9, a nice 8 hours. My son was with ex's cousin because she had to work, I went saw my parents and then went out and saw my cousin, but was too tired to party so I went to Taco Bell where I got my Chilli Cheese burrito with sour cream, yes they have it back there, and then went back and went to sleep.

Friday I was woken at like 8 by my door opening, my mom was trying to wake me up, I said I'll get up at 9. A half hour later I hear my door open again, I was getting up to yell at her and it stopped and I heard my boy in the living room, so I yelled for him, he came in and gave me hugs and kisses and then I got my lazy ass out of bed. We went to the mall and several stores to find presents for his Bday party, he wanted a lot. He made me get him a Batman motorcycle and a Star Wars light saber thing. Plus I payed for half of the stuff that the ex bought for him. He got a tramplene, pool, sandbox, and god knows what else was from us(get to that later). We went to the park and played, where he made me run all over the place and squeeze through places my tall ass couldn't fit through. We went back to my mom's and went to go see my great grandpa in the hospital. I almost lost it there. My great grandpa is 90 years old, fought in WW2, always smiling and always busy, the most active person ever. Seeing him doped up and just laying there was a unique experience for me. I had crazy thoughts while trying to sleep that night. He lost my grandma about 3 years ago and no one expected him to make it this long. He kept bust boating, fishing, and working in his garden. Everytime I came home he'd come over and play with my boy and chat with us. Now family just goes in there and stands awkwardly for as long as they can stand, trying to talk to him and then saying they have to go. I know he never wanted this to happen to him, as I hope I never suffer through that. While we were saying our good byes he started crying saying that this was it. I think this is when I felt the warm saltiness try to trickle down my cheek, but was quickly caught by my finger. In the last 22 years I have never seen this man not smile, even when grandma died, he was so strong and was glad to see the family who has come to ignore them until holidays. We used to go boating with him every summer, he used to do wood working and made my first toybox which is still in my closet at my parents, and made all his grand children grandfather clocks. He was very talented and busy man. Anyhow, it made me realize I don't want to be like that, old in a hospital where people feel they have to come and sit there while I die. I hope I go fast, then I started thinking about the fear of the unknown(death). And it was hard to sleep that night. Oh yeah the fire works were that night too, I went to my cousin's friends house, my boy played with his boys and then we watched the fireworks with him cuddleing on my lap and we talked. It was great. Oh yeah and CG called me and told me not to cheat on her, We talked about why shouldn't I.

Saturday was his bday party. It is always awkward to get my family and hers together, the always stay at different ends of the house, especially since the divorce. He had fun running around, picking at the cake and wanting to open his presents NOW! After everyone ate we told him he could open them. He ran and would rip them open so he could see what they were and then throw it down and her cousin's son would finish unwrapping it for him. He went through a shitload of presents is like 5-10 minutes. After everone left I helped cleanup and said good bye to him so he could stay and play with his toys. I went out with my cousin and shot our own fireworks off. WARNING: Do not tough the top of a lantern that has been on for an hour. I scolded my thumb and forefinger trying to pick one up. The one firework didn't go very high and blew up right above us. I ducked and put my head down to see little flames land around us. It was crazy, my leg was shaking for like an hour afterwards. We hung out and I left and I went to sleep.

Sunday I picked the boy up around 11 and the ex was still sleeping on the couch. We went to my aunts and went out on their small lake with a paddle boat, he was scared but when I asked him if he was scared he said no he was just nervous. We went back and ate some good hotdogs and hamburgers from the grill. He didn't want to eat so I made him take a nap because he was cranky, then I woke him up so he could swim in their pool, it was 4 foot deep so he had to wear a life jacket, he was scared at first, wouldn't let me let him go. Eventually he would try to swim to my dad and to my cousins who were in there. It was a fun time, we went back to my parents house and played with his new whack-a-mole game. He had fun. And then he went to bed while me and mom watched tv and talked a bit.

Monday We woke up and went to see great grandpa again and my grandma's hip was hurting so we saw her too in the hospital, she was 2 rooms down from him, it was a goodbye in the hospital. I yelled at both of them, that I was tired of people being in the hospital when I come home. They both laughed and said they would try harder not to be in there next time. It was hard saying goodbye to my grandpa because I know it will probably be the last time I see him, and I have no clue if I am going to be able to make it home for his funeral. If he can hole out til September we'll all be fine. My son gave me a fat lip while in the hospital too.; He headbutted me on accident, I told him what he did, and he said he didn't do it, followed by "daddy, your lip's bleeding." I told him I told him so and he apologized and kissed it to make it all better, but shit it still hurts. The drive back to here wasn't quite as pleasant, I had to be on heavy alert of cops since fines are doubled on holidays. I didn't get pulled over and made it back safe. I got here and went on base to get some Jim Beam since all I had there was 2 beers all weekend, everything on base was closed, so I went to the store down the road which only had beer and wine. So here I sit with a 12 pack of Bud and plan on finishing it soon. Hope everyone elses weekend was good.

BTW I almost have had 9,000 people check my blog out!