Random Useless facts

I am, almost daily, learning stupid useless facts that I will never need to know. But they are good conversation starters, so I think I'll try to remember or save them and maybe once a week or so post them to share the useless knowledge with everyone else. Plus I usually forget them after a week so I will always be able to refer back to these to remember.

The average human body contains over 100,000 km (60,000 miles) of arteries, veins and capillaries.

The Orion Nebula is the brightest nebula in the sky.

Vincent van Gogh was born in Groot Zundert, The Netherlands on 30 March 1853.

35% of the people using personal ads for dating are already married!

Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

The leading cause of poisoning for children under the age of six in the home is liquid dish soap.

The Giant South African Earthworm can grow up to 22 feet long and 1 inch in thick.

A frog can't empty its stomach by vomitting. To empty its stomach contents, a frog throws up it's stomach first, so the stomach is dangling out of it's mouth. Then the frog uses its forearms to dig out all of the stomach's contents and then swallows the stomach back down again.

A rat can go without water longer than a camel can.

When gentlemen in medieval Japan wished to seal an agreement, they urinated together, crisscrossing their streams of urine.

Ask Uncle Tom

So Canowine, Uncle Tom, and myself all share an office. Canowine is like the yoda, all-knowing, chick magnet. Uncle Tom is the advise giving, angry at everyone, person with no people skills. I am the token "devilworshiper", evil being, goth/punk/freak guy. Obviously since I am the outsider(as usual) I have my own blog. But we finally convinced Uncle Tom to join a blog to be a unusual news guy (he always sends us stupid news articles) and then convinced him to be an advice columnist. So I invite evryone to go to Canowine's blog and ask Uncle Tom a question his email is
uncle_tom_2005@graffiti.net Please don't be shy you can ask him anything. This is a great idea I might need to do my own advice column, I have been known to be a good listener and give pretty good advise though I seem to never follow it myself. I might really think about it though my evil meter may scare away potential clients.

I am God's unwanted child

Unfortuanatly I have realized that I am fucked by recieving a DUI. I am not really that upset about that as I am the other previous post realizing that I am soon to be alone here in a strange place. If my License is revoked I will no longer be able to hang out with almost anybody. If I am put on restriction(God forbid) I will not be able to attend my 3 awesome concerts I have tickets for in April. I had to meet with eveyone today and confess my sins and arrest. I am being put into Drug and Alcohol awarenes program(DAPA) My Masterchief claims that since I was double the legal limit and could pass a field sobriety test that I must have I high tolerence and must be an alcoholic though I claimed to only have 4 drinks the night in question. I have been making a good name for myself at the comand, being Color guard member of the quarter and year, serving on the Axillary security force and trying to be present at most command functions. I was called back at 3pm while I was almost to my second job to meet with our Executive Officer who is cool as shit and said that these facts would not go unnoticed during my UCMJ trial(captains mass though I am at a triservice command with the XO, CO being army) Hopefully my punishment won't be too severe.

Back to the unwanted child. I have not many friends. I don't have a woman to stand by my side. I believe that if I had a woman to be by my side I wouldn't be so down. I live and learn. Only from my mistakes can I understand the severity of my actions. I have my speeches down to give in my trials. I have been looking through my notebook for a writing to post since it has been a while. The majority are about the soul mate I met in seventh grade, though we were kind of together in High school also. Though she had a boyfriend we were also kind of a couple. She left me a message 2 weeks ago, but she works second shift and gets off after I go to bed, and goes to work before I get off. I tried to call her both Saturday and Sunday but she didn't answer nor returned my calls. It hurts, she was my best friend and lead me onto the right path though I soon strayed due to the fact that she had a boyfriend and we "couldn't be together". I remember everything fromthe note I passed her in 7th grade, our fisrst kiss, the night we went to homecoming as "just friends", the day no one was in the house and we had fun on her brothers bed, to the many days we just went rollerbalding in an up and coming neighborhood they were building. I miss her so much. The last time I went home I got a chance to hang out with her and some friends she works with. Though the night didn't turn out as planed. Her ex"boyfriend" was there and she was trying to make him jealous, not wanting to play that role again I walked away for a while to come back to her dancing with an Air Force reservist that was going to Iraq. I was devistated once again. But adapt and overcome and be depressed in private. Life sucks, most women suck(I won't say all, there has to be someone out the compatable for me...doesn't there), I really hate going through my notebook.This notebook was started my freshman year of high school and contains 7women in them though I didn't use there names in there I know which was who, That I thought I was in love with at least for the time being, You know the High school romances and the drama. Out of the 73 writings,14 about ex- wife, 25 about soulmate, then there's the rest of the ramblings and other women, the bad part is that I can only seem to write when I am depressed any other time I seem to have writer's block. Who knows maybe I am as fucked up as others and I joke about. Oh well I guess it's live and let die, have as much fun as I can til that day.

Guess what... I got a DUI

Damn piece of shit, civilian base police fuckers! I pulled into the parking lot for the barracks and the way you come in it is kind of messed up, I was going for my usual parking spot, there was a car in my way so I pulled over by the curb to let the car go and was going to back up and park. Well I pulled to the curb the car came straight into the side and turned his lights on. Sat there for 10 minutes so then I went to back up and park and they almost threw me out of the car thinking I was going to escape. Next there are 4 other cops cars behind me. They yank me out made me walk a line, stand on one foot and all that crap which I did outstanding on, because I practice all the time in case I ever had to do it. Then they cuffed me took me to one police station that had a broken breathalizer, so they took me to another one where I blew a measly 0.16, I was disappointed. They told me I was off some road so I called my buddy to pick me up. After waiting an hour I got tired of waiting and started walking. Come to find out I was not where they told me and where I told my buddy to come. So I ended up stumbling 6 miles down a highway from 4am-630. My buddy finally picked me up about a quarter mile from the base. My feet are killing me! Luckily I shut my phone off before going to sleep I found 10 messages from my cheif, master cheif, along with almost everyone else I know. But you want to know what pisses me off the most, some time in the midst of being arrested I lost the phone number I got from a chick at one of the bars. She was a hottie to damn it. SO now Happy fucking easter to me. I am left alone, with a headache, knowing that I am going to get busted down to E-2, probably get my license taken away, have to pay a fine I won't be able to afford without my license and second job, and my knees and feet are sore as hell. Great fucking holiday. Hope no one else is having this much fun. Time for a nap, shower, and another drink.

Sex Rules

Some ground rules to help people determine if the sex counted. This list of rules can also be very helpful to determine if you have cheated on your spouse or significant other. Wow I think according to these rules I have only had sex with 1 person, the rest didn't count. All can probably be eliminated by the intoxication rule.

Oral Sex does not count.

If you can't remember the person's name the following day... it doesn't count...

If you failed to call the person back to have more sex... doesn't count...

If both of you failed to achieve orgasm...it doesn't count...

Sex with a friend...it doesn't count...it's just another thing you share...

If the act was so lame, you leave thinking "Did I shave my legs for this"...it doesn't count...

An old flame...it doesn't count...

An ex-spouse...it doesn't count, refer to this as a "pity fuck".

Masturbating in front of someone while they do the same, sorry, not sex...it doesn't count...

Cyber-sex - NO WAY - this is glorified masturbation...it doesn't count...

2 heterosexual women having fun, not sex...it doesn't count...

Kissing body parts is not cheating...it doesn't count...

An act to make a married person feel good about themselves, not sex, BUT only if you do not know their significant other...it doesn't count...

An act committed while you were intoxicated...it doesn't count.

An act committed with a family member of your significant other...it doesn't count...this should be referred to as "a skeleton in the family closet".

Acts committed in a public place...it doesn't count...(why should it, it was public right?)

Phone sex...it doesn't count...(refer back to "glorified masturbation")

In car...it doesn't count...way too cramped...if vehicle is in motion and has a console or stick shift...this counts...way too kinky and erotic not to count, unless the act was totally oral, then refer back to rule 1...

An act committed in which the female of the encounter did not achieve total satisfaction (orgasm)...it doesn't count.

An act committed in which total bodily fluids have not been exchanged (pull'n pray method of birth control)...it doesn't count...

An act in which no kissing takes place...it doesn't count... (not considered to be intimate)

An act in which "you do all the work"...it doesn't count.

An act committed with your next door neighbor...it doesn't count, this should be referred to as "being neighborly".

An act committed with an acquaintance because you are angry with your significant other...it doesn't count.

An act which only happens on a random basis...it doesn't count, this should be considered " getting aquatinted "...

An act with a US President...it doesn't count, unless the Senate votes impeachment...

An act with your boss...it doesn't count, just considered career enhancement; and/or additional employee benefits.

Guess what...I'm drunk!

I am so fucking bummed out. I am outta alcohol. I need to keep an emergency bottle of Jim Beam hidden for when I run out and the base Package store is closed. I don't think I need to be driving off base to get more. But thats not why I am so bummed. I found out yesterday but had it confirmed today. 3 people I work with are going to Iraq May 1st. Two of them I am pretty good friends with. Granted 3 people from where I work have been to Iraq and came back safely but they were only gone for about 3 months. They are supposed to be gone for a year. One of them just got married and the other one just had a baby a couple months ago. Why is fate so creul? It couldn't have pulled single soldiers ( yeah they are all in the army). This blows. Not to mention my best friend since my divorce, I been at her house pretty much every weekend, is leaving to go to Korea for 2 years. So I am gonna be alone again. I have been dreading getting back into the dating scene. If I don't have any friends I am gonna have to. I have to find someone to keep me company at least til Jan 2007. But then what I don't know. Damn my life sucks, at least I am not getting thrown to Iraq with a months notice. FUCK! They better get to come home soon. I wish them all the best. I love them, they are great friends. I hope they get home safe and in one piece. Ok I gotta get to bed, I have to play basketball in the morning and get up at 530, yay for me. Goodninght all.

The Perfect Woman

The perfect attitude for the perfect woman. I got this in an email, I agree with everything except the golfing.

1. I'll swallow it all, I love the taste.
2. Are you sure you've had enough to drink?
3. I'm bored... Let's shave my pussy.
4. Shouldn't you be down at the bar with your buddies?
5. That was a great fart. Can you do it again?
6. I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house.
7. You're so sexy when your hungover.
8. I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping.
9. Would you like to watch me go down on my girlfriend?
10. Let's subscribe to Hustler.
11. Let's go to the mall so you can check out women's asses.
12. I'll be outside painting the house.
13. I love it when you play golf every Sunday. How about Saturday too?
14. Honey...Our neighbor's daughter is sunbathing again, come quick.
15. Is it too tight for you back there? Please try again.
16. No,no. I'll take the car in for an oil change.
17. Your mother is way better than mine.
18. DO me a favor and just forget that Valentine thing...You need those new clubs.
19. I understand. Our anniversary comes every year. You go ahead out hunting with the boys. I know what a stress reliever it is.
20. Oh come on. What do you say we get a good porn movie, a box of beer, and a few joints, I'll get my friend Tammy for a three way.
21. Not the mall again, Let's go to a strip joint.
22. Listen I'll make enough money for the both of us. Why don't you retire.
23. God! I swear! If I don't get to blow you soon, I'm going to burst!
24. I signed up for yoga, just so I can get my ankles behind my head for you.
25. No, no, no...You stay in bed, I'll take care of it. You need your sleep.

Like something out of a cartoon

I found this on Yahoo news, it is a great idea. I know sometimes when I know I won't want to get up in the morning, I put an alarm clock far away so I have to get up to shut it off.

LONDON (Reuters) - Can't get out of bed in the morning?

Scientists at MIT's Media Lab in the United States have invented an alarm clock called Clocky to make even the doziest sleepers, who repeatedly hit the snooze button, leap out of bed.
After the snooze button is pressed, the clock, which is equipped with a set of wheels, rolls off the table to another part of the room.
"When the alarm sounds again, simply finding Clocky ought to be strenuous enough to prevent even the doziest owner from going back to sleep," New Scientist magazine said Tuesday.

I just don't understand how it knows where walls are or if it's like those little toys that run into walls and turn and keep going. That would be awesome!

I'm just following the crowd

Since I have noticed several people doing the 100 things about me posts and blogs. I of course thought that I'd do one myself. I am a weird/ little fucked up guy. Go ahead if you dare find out how much I am. I also added it to the side bar so all can check it. I am just putting random things on there, probably almost everyday. It's nice to have one of those oh I forgot, just add stuff on the end, possibly infinite posts.
My "get to know me list" blog

Some funnies

Check out a nice little animated short about Michael Jackson here. I'm gonna pick me up one so my son will behave. Here's a letter from your boss.


TO: All employees

FROM: The boss

DATE: March 22, 2005

RE: Foul Language

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their coworkers. Due to complaints received from some employees who are easily offended, this type of language will be no longer tolerated. We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with coworkers. Therefore, a list of new phrases has been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner without risk of offending our more sensitive employees.

TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: When the fuck do you expect me to do this?

TRY SAYING: I'm certain that is not feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No fucking way!

TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You've got to be shitting me.

TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with . . .
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a shit.

TRY SAYING: Of course I'm concerned.
INSTEAD OF: Ask me if I give a shit.

TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It's not my fucking problem.

TRY SAYING: That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the fuck?

TRY SAYING: I'm not sure I can implement this.
INSTEAD OF: fuck it, it won't work.

TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner?

TRY SAYING: Are you sure this is a problem?
INSTEAD OF: Who the fuck cares?

TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the problem.
INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his ass.

TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my ass.

TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at this moment.
INSTEAD OF: fuck it, I'm on salary.

TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your ass.

TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This job sucks.

TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the hell died and made you boss?

TRY SAYING: I see.
INSTEAD OF: Bite me.

TRY SAYING: Yes, we really should discuss it.
INSTEAD OF: Another fucking meeting?

TRY SAYING: I don't think this will be a problem.
INSTEAD OF: I really don't give a shit.

TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a fucking prick.

TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She's a ball-busting bitch.

TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: What the fuck are you doing?

Sincerely,

The Boss

God bless Trillian!

For all of you with multiple IM tools, such as msn, yahoo, AIM, ICQ. I found out yesterday there is a device called Trillian. This is a device you download and log into and can access all of them with one tool. You can have multiple yahoos, msns and log into everything and have all your contacts on one screen. It rocks! I was haveing one of the computer peoples at work fix my comp and told him I needed to get updated version of msn(the only IM on my comp at work) and he downloaded Trillian for me. It saves space and time. When I get home from work I jump on my comp and log into Yahoo and sometimes AIM and usually forget about msn since I only have a few friends that actually use it. Now I can log into one thing and everyone is available. No need to click one to see who is on there and then another. God I love technology, it helps me be even lazier. I suggest everyone download it.

My name is Randy and I'm an addict

While I was driving to my second job yesterday, I was thinking about addiction. I know I am addicted to nicotine and maybe alcohol. I drink alot but I don't really think it's an addiction except in public. I can't be a DD because when I see everyone else drinking having a good time, I want to too. But by myself I don't have to have a drink, like I have to have a cigarette. I thought that was it, then I started to wonder if I was actually addicted to going to concerts. The past year since the ex left I have been to a shit load. Here's a break down.

With ex(in 4 years):
Korn/Staind
Godsmack/Staind
Slipknot/Fear Factory/Chamira

After ex(in 8 months):
HFStival bands I saw: O.A.R./Yellowcard/Lostprophets/Yeah Yeah Yeahs/Cypress Hill/Violent Femmes/New Found Glory/P.O.D./Jay-Z/The Offspring/The Cure
Otep/Kittie
The Hives/Sahara Hotnights
Gwar/Mensrea
Marilyn Manson/Slunt
Arcade Fire/Final Fantasy
Ash/The Bravery
Ambulance LTD
Hawthorene Heights/Sugarcult

....I think there's more I'll check my ticket stub collection when I get home.
and next month I already have tickets for Garbage, Bloc Party, The Kills.
Does that count as an addiction? At least 9 concerts in 8 months, that's more than I a month, and many more to come.

Lesson's Learned

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes.

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

I've learned that if at first you don't succeed, check to see if the loser gets anything.

I've learned that brain cells come and go, but fat cells are forever.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.

I've learned that you can keep puking long after you think you're finished.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place.

I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones who do.

I've learned that we don't have to ditch bad friends, because their dysfunction makes us feel better about ourselves.

I've learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get arrested and end up in the local paper.

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away.

Pass this cool poem to 5 friends, they will appreciate it. Maybe something good will happen to you. If not....tough shit!

I love my guitar!

SO since I've gotten my guitar I play every week night(weekends I am too drunk and usually not home) until my fingertips hurt from the strings and my hand cramps from positioning them. I am really trying not to let it be like my electric one I got when I was 16. I was really too busy partying then to learn. Friday I broke a string already and had to go to Guitar Center(HELL). It is so freaking huge and crowded of people and little children playing instruments probably better than I ever will(I hate them all) and the people who work there flock to them and ignore the tall skinny guy dressed like a bum(cuz he has no money)and got new strings, then I broke it while trying to put it on and had to go back last night. FOr all those who need to know how to restring a guitar here is a video for you. Restring your guitar although it shows an electric it shows you the basic that you can use on an acoustic. Also if your good at hearing notes (I think I am deaf, too many concerts and loud noises) Check out this Online tuner.

Anyway I usually spend a night trying to do one song, though the next night I usually forget how to do the song from the night before. Last night I learned Nine Inch Nails- Something I Can Never Have, from the Natural Born Killers soundtrack. It is super easy, only 3 notes. Of course most of the song is piano/synthesizor/other things which I didn't think about when I picked my song to learn. One thing that pisses the hell out of me, when I look up tabs for a song, every different site has a slight variation of how to play the song. I found today that Ultimate guitar has pretty much every song and has the variations as well. It really helps because their all on one site as opposed to searching for one song and getting a million different sites. This week I will be concentrating on Nirvana Unplugged (My all time favorite band and album!) I found a way to copy the tabs into word so I can take them home with me to aleviate the need for me to get online and be distracted by yahoo messenger and AIM and all the rest of the things that people pop up. Well I will probably still be on there, but invisible so I can chose who's worth distracting me.

Right in Sam Endicott from The Bravery's face 

More Sam Endicott from The Bravery howling 

More Sam Endicott from The Bravery
 

THE CRIMEA, ASH, and THE BRAVERY oh my!

What a great freaking show! I had to get up at 6am this morning so I didn't drink to much and remember the entire show. Yay! I also got an arms length from the stage and got some good pics, well I think so, I'll check later and post some. I was blown away starting with the opening band. THE CRIMEA (pronounced cry-me-ah) blew mw away. Ironically when Ech and I were in line to get in, we were talking about The Doors and Jim Morrison being wasted at most of his shows. The Lead singer Davey took the stage and acted really wasted. Through his performance he almost clocked a fan with his guitar, knocked down the mic stand several times, did a skinny white boy puck dance that if you did anywhere but on stage you probably wouldn't leave alive. But the music was just magnificient. When we met Davey later he didn't seem wasted, it may have just been an act or him feeling the music As soon as they left the stage I ran to buy their EP "Lottery Winners on Acid", which is great, though not as hard as they performed. They ended their set with a song called Opposite Ends, I can't even explain their greatness of this song live that isn't on the EP. Towards the end they went into this instrumental break that brought a tear to my eye. It was this excruciatingly loud screaming guitar with Davey wailing in the background. Oh I wish I could explain it, it was almost like Nirvana unplugged "Where did You Sleep Last Night" I was totally engulfed in the moment. Ok but then afterwards we met and talked with the entire band by the merchant table and had them all sign or EP.

The next act was ASH who I didn't know to well. They were apparently headlining the tour but then came on second to our suprise. They were very engaged with the crowd. They played alot of fast paced crowd jumpin' songs. They had a lot of fans who came just for them. They had great great guitar solos, though the bassist was very wierd, looking like he was pissed and giving everyone a death stare. We talked about it afterwards and think he may just trying to be like Wes from Limp Bizkit and be that guy in the band.

The we get to THE BRAVERY God, the whole show just completly rocked. Their hair was like Elvis, except the singer Sam Endicott who reminded me more of The Misfits hair. I don't know. It always seem I end up on the wrong place at shows. I am usually on the right side, which I was last night, and the bassist Mike H was on the left. He not once but twice surfed the crowd which was awesome and the first time I actually saw a band member do that. And later an older (like probably 50s) couple was in the front row ended up undoing his pants and they dropped not once but twice also. I know at least one picture of Sam came out, I literally had the camera in his face. He seemed to love performing with his Elvis like dance moves and leaning out over the crowd. They came back out for an encore since Sams parents were in the crowd, probably the one's pulling down Mike's pants. Damn out of all the shows I've seen this one definatly ranks top 5, which is outstanding for the bands not really being that famous. Plus usually the opening band isn't good or one just doesn't sound that good. All 3 bands kicked ass and rocked The Black Cat

WTF is next?

Today while checking my blogstats, I found someone came from Blogshares. I thought I'd check it out and see what this site I never heard of was. It appears that they now have a fantasy blog stock site. I don't quite understand it yet. I signed up so I would have something else to keep me busy at work. I figured they would start yelling at me if I kept bringing my guitar in everyday. Everyone go off and play with fantasy money and try to learn the stock market, get good at it, then invest real money into my company whenever I start one. I don't think you actually win anything. Here is from their intro:

What is BlogShares
BlogShares is a fantasy stock market where weblogs are the companies. Players invest fictional dollars on shares in blogs. Blogs are valued by their incoming links and add value to other blogs by linking to them. Prices can go up or down based on trading and the underlying value of the blog.

And apparently I need everyone who doesn't have a link to me on their blof to please add me, it make the value of my site to go up.

Do you have a personality?

See what kind of personality you have on the Ultimate Personality Test

Randy, you're a Shark!

You've got a healthy love of life and a killer instinct. Chances are you hate rules, and don't plan on getting old. You're flexible and friendly on top of being innovative and smart. In short, people respect you.

You're extroverted and love being in the spotlight. Your mantra is "work hard, play hard" — you live life to the limit.

And that's just scratching the surface!

Me with my new guitar trying to play Green Day-Good Riddance. Thanks canowine for tuning it and showing me how to play this song. 

Which Ring of Hell are you?

Thanks to Brandyland You can find out which level of Hell you will go to when you die. I am very disappointed that it says I am only going to the seventh level, especially when it says extreme for fourth through eighth and very high in nineth. Oh well I am sure I will have fun. My plan has always actually been that when I went to Hell, I am going to recruit a gang with those like Hitler, Napoleon, Ted Bundy, Charles Manson, and all the other super crazy people and we are going to overthrow Lucifer. So everyone look for me in probably 30-40 years down there.

Seventh Level of Hell

---

Guarded by the Minotaur, who snarls in fury, and encircled within the river Phlegethon, filled with boiling blood, is the Seventh Level of Hell. The violent, the assasins, the tyrants, and the war-mongers lament their pitiless mischiefs in the river, while centaurs armed with bows and arrows shoot those who try to escape their punishment. The stench here is overpowering. This level is also home to the wood of the suicides- stunted and gnarled trees with twisting branches and poisoned fruit. At the time of final judgement, their bodies will hang from their branches. In those branches the Harpies, foul birdlike creatures with human faces, make their nests. Beyond the wood is scorching sand where those who committed violence against God and nature are showered with flakes of fire that rain down against their naked bodies. Blasphemers and sodomites writhe in pain, their tongues more loosed to lamentation, and out of their eyes gushes forth their woe. Usurers, who followed neither nature nor art, also share company in the Seventh Level.

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Extreme
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Extreme
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Extreme
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Extreme
Level 7 (Violent)	Extreme
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Extreme
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Very High

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

Meaningful Misconceptions

I am begining to believe my life has become too boring to blog. Either that or I am just lazy and can't think of anything to blog so here's a cool little joke I got emailed to me.

Meaningful Misconceptions

Abdicate--v., to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

Carcinoma--n., a valley in California, notable for its heavy smog.

Esplanade--v., to attempt an explanation while drunk.

Willy-nilly--adj., impotent.

Flabbergasted--adj., appalled over how much weight you have gained.

Negligent--adj., describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie.

Lymph--v., to walk with a lisp.

Gargoyle--n., an olive-flavored mouthwash.

Bustard--n., a very rude Metrobus driver.

Coffee--n., a person who is coughed upon.

Flatulence--n., the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

Balderdash--n., a rapidly receding hairline.

Testicle--n., a humorous question on an exam.

Semantics--n., pranks conducted by young men studying for the priesthood, including such things as gluing the pages of the priest's prayer book together just before vespers.

Rectitude--n., the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.

Marionettes--n., residents of Washington who have been jerked around by Mayor Barry.

Oyster--n., a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.

Circumvent--n., the opening in the front of boxer shorts

Urg, I hate Mondays

Mondays suck. I had a rough weekend, went to a concert Saturday night. I went to see Ambulance LTD Though I drank half a bottle of Jim Beam before I left for it. So details on the event are a little sketchy. I remember almost wrecking my buddies new car, standing in line, one of the bands kind or rocked(not sure if it was Ambulance or VHS vs. Beta), then going home. All in all I guess it was worth $15 to laugh at canowine and Ech because they wanted to go. The only prob is when Ech called me on Sunday and asked me how it was, I just mumbled still drunk that it was ok. I need to stop getting so drunk at concerts. There are only a few concerts I remember not getting wasted at. Oh well as long as I have fun, right?

I also hate military mail people. I bought a guitar online that was supposed to be here Friday, they were closed. I stop in this morning at 8 when they were supposed to be open at 730, they were closed. I continued to beat on the door until someone in the back heard and opened the door. I told him I was supposed to have a very important package that was delivered on Friday, he said he'd look, and shut the door. I think he just stood behind the door for about a minute and then opened it back up and said nope not back here check back after lunch. I wanted to kick him in the face. All day Friday I was so excited to get my guitar and then all the BS in between. If I can't pick it up after lunch I think I am going to go postal on the post office. Ok think I'm done bitching for now, time to eat and try again on my guitar.

Uhhh, Gawd

This is bad! I am extremly bored at my second job and tryin to look like I am doing important computer work. Wow these quizes are great they are all right on the money about me try them for yourself!!!!!!!!!


You are Tater Tots. Go get your own!!


Which Napoleon Dynamite character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


You are the bad boy / girl of your school. You
have little faith in yourself and usually find
escape in some sort of addicting substance or
yourself. You would rather torture others
above anything else. You regularly skip
school and when you go, always tend to ditch a
certain class. Some classmates can fear you
while others pity you...and your family. (No
offense) Your cruel behavior and abject
personality tends to single you out from the
crowd...and you prefer life this way at times.
However, lonliness can rear its ugly head and
force you seek a way to silence it. But be
warned, your path is dangerous... but only a
strong person can walk this road.

Some
ideal occupations for you can be a Police
officer, Celebrity (who doesn't love the
badasses?), Wrestler, Polotician, or some sort
of leader. Either way, your destined to be
known by many.


What type of teenager are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


Your a Vampire! Maybe a tad goth...your obsessed
with the night. Maybe Killing the living,
Sucking the blood off the innocent. You my
friend are the deadliest creature out there.


Are you a Vampire/Goth/Punk/Poser/Emo/ or just a plain PREP!?
brought to you by Quizilla

Garbage is Back!!!

For all the "Stupid Girl"'s and people who are "Only Happy When it Rains", Garbage is back from their break. According to Garbage.com they aren't even sure if they broke up or just took a break. They are gearing up for a rockin limited US Tour for their upcoming album, Bleed Like Me. I will be attempting to get my presale tickets to their show at the 930 club here in DC in half an hour. Their single "Why Do You Love Me?" is popping up on charts all over. I found it online courtesy of Filter Magazine. Give it a listen it is awesome!
"Why Do You Love Me?"

Get to know your fellow Bloggers

This is fun as Hell! I don't know which is better being interviewed or interviewing others. Thank you Branshine your delightful, thought provoking questions were fun to answer.

This is a "Tag! You're It" kind of exercise except you have to volunteer to be tagged.
Here were my questions:

1. What made you decide to go into the military, do you regret this decision?
I never wanted to join the military, I was always anti-everything. I was 18 married with a son, couldn't keep a job, I kept working temp jobs for a month to 3 months at a time. I didn't feel like a "man" because I couldn't support my family. I was in the unemployment office looking on a computer for jobs in the medical field and a bunch of Navy jobs popped up. I went in and joined that month and was at bootcamp 3 months later. I don't regret it, it really helped me become a mature adult. I have grown to love my job, the comradery.

2. Describe the biggest heartbreak you have ever felt.
I kept trying to think of which woman hurt the worse when I realized what my biggest heartbreak truly was. When my ex-wife left, not her though, the fact that she took my son and moved 8 hrs away back to our hometown. He is my world, if it wasn't for him I don't know where I'd be today. In 2 more years I will leave the Navy, which I have grown to love so I can be with him again.

3.If you knew you were going to die in 3 months what would you make sure to do before you died?
I'd spend as much time with my son is possible. Go skydiving, fly all around the world especially to Ireland and Germany, Go to everyone whose ever done me wrong and beat the crap out of them with a bat(probably last thing I'd do), Blow all my money on things for Aaron(my son).

4. If God was deciding to send you parents to Heaven or Hell based only on the job they did raising you, where do you think your parents would go?
They would definitely go to Heaven(if it exists). At the time I hated them, they were so strict on me. But now looking back, they did what they could to make me a good person. The only part that was actually bad was we never communicated. I mean never, we'd go weeks saying only a couple words to each other. But it is much better now.

5. As you entered your "adult" life what was the biggest disappointment about being "grown up?"
Grew up to fast!! My son was conceived on my 18th birthday, We were married 3 months later. So my world was in shock, I was struggling to find work in a small town. Dealing with not being able to go out and have fun like I was used to. I am making up for it now while I can though, once I get back I am Daddy again.

Now, here are the rules for this Blog-a-thon. I'll offer to interview the next three people to respond to this post that will follow these rules:
1. Leave me a comment saying “interview me.”
2. I will respond by asking you five questions here. They will be different questions than the ones above.
3. You will update your blog/site with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Mermaids!!

This is a photograph of a dead mermaid that was washed onto a Chennai beach after the Dec 26 tsunami. I received this pic in an email as many of you probably have. This is supposed to be just another email prank. No one has actually seen the body/carcass or what ever you would call it. I don't see why people are such non-believers to begin with. Why can't there be mermaids? Obviously someone somewhere sometime saw one or else how would they be able to invent such a thing. The only problem I have with the notion is why are they all perceived to be females, shouldn't there be male ones too. Do they breed like fish, they don't look like they could do it like mammals like the bloodhound gang.

Perhaps the doubt started because of PT Barnum. According to Ripley's believe it or not in 1842 people paid 25 cents to see the "Fiji Mermaid", but later he admitted that it was the upper half of a monkey fused together with the bottom of a fish. Perhaps if people wouldn't kept fooling everyone we'd all still believe. It's "the boy who cried wolf" syndrome. Just because we don't have proof doesn't make it not real. No I am not a hypocrite for saying how can someone believe in a God they have never seen him, he is a supposed supernatural being which is a totally different story. This is just a creature/animal. I'm also not saying I believe I am just saying it might not be as absurd as everyone says.