Last Thursday of the year

HB and I celebrated the last thursday of the year last night by preparing a big ass meal of frozen meal including pizza, egg rolls, potato wedges, tequitos, mozzerela sticks, buffalo wings, and jalapeno poppers. pictured here:

The grease and breading made my stomach fat and sore, HB was kind enough to take this lovely picture of my huge belly:

But apparently we are going out tomorrow night to have some NewYears fun and I will try to take some pics and see what she'll let me post. Have a sefe New Years!

I'm Back

Ok Let me see if I can recap most events fairly quickly. I woke up bright and fucking early last Wednesday to leave. I couldn't wake HB up though she subconsciously gave me a hug and kiss and mumbled "I love you". I was off by 630. Traffic wasn't bad, it was nice. Hit some snow in Pennsylvania, which state workers tried to kill me not once but twice. First time, if anyone has been on Penn turnpike, it is really curvy and don't have shoulders on the left side in a lot of places so I was cruising around 75 or 80 like usual and going around a curve and out of no where theres one of the trucks with the flashing arrow stoppen on the road. Cars in front of me slam on their brakes as do I, luckily no accident. So later still cruising and there's like no traffic and there's a state park truck on the right shoulder with a big long ass trailer that decided to go from the shoulder across all lanes and through a hole in the median. I had to slam on my brakes an swerve across 2 lanes to avoid hitting his trailer. If there had been another car I would have hit it because it happened so fast I didnt even look. But I made it home by 2pm. My parents were both at work so I went to a car dealership and traded in the minivan. That's right, I no longer drive a minivan! I bought a 2006 pontiac G6 that looks like THIS I may take a pic soon with my new digital camera that my parents got me. But it was great. I went and picked up my son, he's gotten so big! and smart as hell, I could have real conversations with him. We spent time together and with family. I got to see a really old friend that I hadn't seen or spoke to in a long time, caught up on some old times. I went and saw former SM. Aaron played with her kid, it was pretty nice to chat, gotta go see her family that I was really close too I really missed her brothers. It was nice and very helpful. Being truely and sincerly in love with HB I realized that I wanted to consider former SM, I need to think of something else, a soulmate when all she's ever truely been was a best friend except at one point in time it had benefits. I realized that she is like a sister to me like New years girl. Chicks that I'd beat the shit out of anyone who treats them bad and who they've and I've always talked about the ups and downs of relationships with. OK now I'm sounding gay but they are truely like sisters to me, especially FSM because I was really close with her family and when I stopped over they treated me the same as they did 6-7 years ago. Oh yeah NY girl is back with her BF that said she can't talk to me so I didnt get to talk to her but her mom said she'd tell her I said hi. I didn't really hang out otherwise. I spent friday out with my cousin and we couldn't find anything to do, she's in college in a different town so didnt hang around there and isn't 21 so we couldnt go in the bars. That was basically my trip. Spent alot of time with my boy and family. Got a new car. I tried to hook my speakers up myself, after cutting my hands and cursing too much I took it and paid $70 to get them put in. I came home last night to HB's. I missed her way too much while I was gone. My parents were probably sick of hearing me talk about her. When FSM asked if I still planned on coming back next year I told her that I was pretty sure I'd be staying here and told her all about her. She was glad that I finally found someone I am so compatable with. She knew me and the ex didn't get along at all. But I think thats about all. So now I need to get my lazy ass up and dressed to go back to HB's. I will try to catch up on otherblogs tomorrow when I go back to my other job. Hope everyone else had a good christmas. I am glad to be back!

So I decided to also do some quizzes since I am a copycat and needed to kill some time before I go up to get my records from work. So here are some of the things I did:

You are a Self-Discoverer

You're not religious, but you've created your own kind of spirituality. Introspective and thoughtful, you tend to look inward for the divine. You are distrusting of all forms of organized religion. You especially dislike religious gurus and leaders, who you feel are charlatans.

What's Your Religious Philosophy?

Sure, I guess I thought I'd get agnostic or atheist.

Your 2005 Song Is

Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day "My shadow's the only one that walks beside me My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating" In 2005, you bummed everyone out. Like you care.

What Hit Song of 2005 Are You?

Good song!

Your Seduction Style: Sweet Talker

Your seduction technique can be summed up with "charm" You know that if you have the chance to talk to someone... Well, you won't be talking for long! ;-) You're great at telling potential lovers what they want to hear. Partially, because you're a great reflective listener and good at complementing. The other part of your formula? Focusing your conversation completely on the other person. Your "sweet talking" ways have taken you far in romance - and in life. You can finess your way through any difficult situation, with a smile on your face. Speeding tickets, job interviews... bring it on! You truly live a *charmed life*

What Kind of Seducer Are You?

I guess, what do you think baby?

You're A Crazy Drunk

When you drink, you get wrecked - and it ain't pretty.

What Kind of Drunk Are You?

Yep but I have fun!

You Are 20 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Close, usually I get 3.

Your Power Color Is Red-Orange

At Your Highest: You are warm, sensitive, and focused on your personal growth. At Your Lowest: You become defensive and critical if you feel attacked. In Love: You are loyal - but you demand the respect you deserve. How You're Attractive: You are very affectionate and inspire trust. Your Eternal Question: "Am I Respected?"

What's Your Power Color?

I like orange.

How You Life Your Life

You tend to deprive yourself of things you crave, for your own good. You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think. You prefer a variety of friends and tend to change friends quickly. Some of your past dreams have disappointed you, but you don't let it get you down.

How Do You Live Your Life?

Yep that's me.

How You Are In Love

You fall in love quickly and easily. And very often. You tend to take more than give in relationships. You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time. You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change. You are fickle and tend to fall out of love easily. You bounce from romance to romance.

How Are You In Love?

Half right, half wrong. I don't jump from relationship to another. ANd I think I give more than take.

On Average, You Would Sell Out For

$983,755

At What Price Would You Sell Out?

Sounds good to me, when do I get my money?

You Are Japanese Food

Strange yet delicious. Contrary to popular belief, you're not always eaten raw.

What Kind of Food Are You?

I just like the "you try" chicken.

Slacker Kid

High school was a place you showed up occasionally, but you didn't really leave a mark. You hated rules, authority, and structure. In fact, you still do.

Who Were You In High School?

Yep, right on the money, well freaky slacker.

The Movie Of Your Life Is An Indie Flick

You do things your own way - and it's made for colorful times. Your life hasn't turned out how anyone expected, thank goodness! Your best movie matches: Clerks, Garden State, Napoleon Dynamite

If Your Life Was a Movie, What Genre Would It Be?

Good movies! GOSH!

Your Pimp Name Is...

Pimp Daddy Trickz

What's Your Pimp Name?

What do you think baby, can you call me that from now on?

Your World View

You are a fairly broadminded romantic and reasonably content. You value kindness and try to live by your ideals. You have strong need for security, which may be either emotional or material. You respect truth and are flexible. You like people, and they can readily make friends with you. You are not very adventurous, but this does not bother you.

What Is Your World View?

I'm adventurous sometimes, though I don't really like people.

The Cure Shares Your Taste in Music

See their whole playlist here (iTunes required)

Which Musician (or Group) Shares Your Taste in Music?

Righteous!

My luck strikes again

Yeah so things have been going great and all then things starts hitting the fan like usual. Things are still righteous with HB, thankfully. But I had some good money set aside to have a wonderful christmas and was planning on giving my parents some money to help out their problems. As I said before, my van is fucked up and I was going to save some money to trade it in but apparently I didn't/don't have as muh time as I thought. I was hoping to be able to put back $2,000 to put as a down payment since I still owe a shitload on it. Well Saturday the tire blew yet again on my way home from my other job. SO I decided that my time is out. I don't wanna have to keep spending $70 every what, I think that tire lasted a month and a half. SO all the money I had saved up and was going to give my parents are now going for the down payment. I called my dad and asked if he would co-sign, if I needed it, when I got home. He said yeah if he could, their money problems have probably fucked up their credit worse than it already was. SO now I feel like an ass and will have no money to give them. Hopefully I can get away with putting 1,000 down and that leaves me with a couple hundred from my savings that I will need for gas and some more christmas presents. I still have nothing for my dad, I spent 140 at ToysRus today for my boy, and have a couple sweatshirts for my mom. This sucks ass! Why can't an armored car blow up in front of me on the road so I can run out and grab a bunch of cash and run away. Or hell I'd be happy with my van getting totalled so I don't have to pay on it anymore! I guess those things only happen to people in the movies or people who cheat the insurance companies. Hmmmmmmm..... I could, what prank post prank post! damn hackers typing things in my blog. Oh well tis the season to be broke. Thats why I am sitting here at my boring ass job getting payed to blog and do other shit when I could be spending time with my love before I leave. Wednesday morning is when I am planning to make the drive. I doubt I'll be able to blog while I am there since my parents still think the internet is evil but I may send some audioblogs, especially if I get drunk. Well Happy Monday!

Pics I promised!

Uncle Tom about to cry because he couldn't meet Rachel Ray and try to kiss her on the cheek to win a bet!


Me ringing the bell for Salvation Army

Thusday madness and well today too.

SO today was my first day "off". I was still awoken nice and early by HB after I told her last night that I'd drive her to work this morning since I suspected we'd have a ton of ice on the road. I apparently forgot and she didn't remind me so her attempt to wake me up were answered with grunts and me rolling over and covering my head. I really felt bad when I actually woke up. I went to the USU holiday gathering thing today. Only because she wanted me there. Traffic sucked major ass, took me an hour and a half to go 18 miles up the road. Then she got stuck doing another job so she was late. I played a few games of bowling(it was at a bowling alley) and sucked ass. She showed up and then I had to leave shortly after. I needed to come to my other job to make some more cash. I need to try to get as many hours as possible and try to send some money home because my parents are having some cash problems. But thats another story that I don't have time for since I am on the clock. I think I have an infected tooth. My mouth taste bad, either that or it was the food at the party, but I do have a fucked up tooth. I need to go to the denist sometime, maybe after I check into my new command next month or sooner if HB can't stand the nastiness that may be growing in my mouth. I know I brushed my teeth this morning but it still taste like morning breath. I'm sure all of you are really enjoying hearing this. Sometime this weekend I will go home and seriously put the pick of me ringing the bell. and the pick I took of Uncle TOm crying because he couldn't meet Rachel Ray. So last night HB came to my place and then followed me to the mall she was to be at. We get there and Uncle Tom called me sounding like he was going to cry, saying that you had to buy tickets and they were sold out. We went by anyways and it was crazy. Lines went all around the mall. So we walked around for a while, then I said I had to split to go listen to MADD, I called my probation officeer earlier to make sure it was still on dispite the weather, he said yes. SO I had to fly to the groceery store to get a money order, they only accepted money orders since we had to pay to listen to them. Had problems at the store, I was on a strict time limit, they wanted cash or debit card, I didn't have either, my debit card is like a credit card so I had to run to an ATM and then back to get it. I drove really fast on slick roads made some wrong turns and U-turns and finally get on the right road and park. I walk up and down on the sidewalk that was really a sheet of ice. and couldn't find the building. I was freezing and wet so I decided to give up. When I did that I found the building. 7pm, right on time so I went in, there was a sign set up that said it was cancelled. I was furious! SO I drove up to HB's house. Damn MADD people I could have had a relaxing evening, maybe watched a movie or started my christmas shopping but no. I ran around trying to get there on time and all for nothing. OH well, better do some work so I can take off kind of early. Hope everyone has a good weekend.

Random facts for my last day at USU

Today I am turning in my keys and geeting my 5.26GB of music off my computer and clearing the shit from my desk. Good riddance to this place, though I know I'm gonna miss it. I don't wanna get all emotional and cry and shit(yeah right). But here is some random facts that will cheer myself and everyone else up.

In India, a 9-year-old girl was "married" to a stray dog, which tribal custom requires in order to protect a child whose first tooth appears on the upper gum.

The average four year-old child asks over four hundred questions a day. (Why,Why,Why?)

The Welwitschia plant can live up to 1,000 years.

Over 175 million cubic yards of earth was removed for the creation of the Panama Canal.

India has the most post offices in the world.

There are approximately 100 million acts of sexual intercourse each day. (Let's get that number up to 200million!)

Mexico City boasts the world's largest taxi fleet with over sixty thousand taxis running every day.

Queen Elizabeth II was Time Magazine's "Man of The Year" in 1952. (That's a man, baby!)

When a women is pregnant, her senses are all heightened. (And her cooter catches a cold and leaks snot!)

About 500,000 kids in the US live in same sex households.

When a polar bear cub is born, it can not see or hear. It takes approximately a month for the cub to start to see and hear.

There are five million scent receptors located in a human beings nose.

The artist Michelangelo's full name in Italian is Michaelangelo di Lodovico di Lionardo di Buonarroto Simoni.

The oldest documented footwear found was a 8,000 year-old sandal found in a cave located in Missouri, USA. (Chris found them and wears them almost everyday)

In 1685, New France used playing cards as currency because of the shortage of coins. (Great if you had extra cards when it started!)

Life

Yesterday's post was about death so I will make todays post about Life. This morning on the way to work they were talking about THIS A skydiver that landed face first in a parking lot after parachute malfuntioned and survived and during here emergency room visit found out that she was 2 weeks pregnant and the baby was still alive and well. You can watch the video and see her HERE. It is quite amazing.

Last night I went with Uncle Tom to ring the bell for the salvation army. It was kind of fun except for the 22* weather. He took a pic of me in the smock and crap that I will post later when I get home. It was fun, old people mostly gave and little kids would get money from their parents to put into the pot. Uncle Tom brought candy canes to give to the kids, it was cool. Ringing the bell was harder than I thought. At first it wasn't too bad though I noticed I couldn't keep a steady ring, I kept changing the pace and loudness. Then as my hands went numb and my fingers became stiff I had to shake my whole hand to get a sound and that was even worse. Then when I had to switch to my left hand it was horendous. We started talking about if someone tried to steal the pot, we wouldn't be able to do anything, out feet were way to numb and sore to be able to run after anyone. It was kind of fun though, we just kind of BS'd and it was nice to know that we were doing something to help out. He's trying to do it like twice a week which is really great. I'd do it with him but I need to make money at my other job. I stayed the night and we went back and drank some beer with his bro and talked. First thing his bro said to me is "hey Tom says you've got a girlfriend and she's hot!" I just started laughing and said "yeah, she's really hot!" His bro is awesome, we talked a bit about Tom's bachelor party in March that we are to plan. Good times!

Today is my going away luncheon here. We are going to Hard Times get some good Chili! I'm not putting on my uniform today and tomorrow I'm going to be naked so I guess I'm not wearing camoflauge again unless it's to play paintball or something. I get paid tomorrow and oh almost foprgot tomorrow Rachael Ray is going to be at the mall signing autographs and canowine bet Uncle Tom he wouldn't ask to get a pic of him kissing her on the cheek. I know he will wuss out so I am to go for one to take the pic and 2 because I am sure I'll have to do the talking as he is drooling and tripping over his tongue. Like both of them did on the way back from one of our excercises and the Polyphonic Spree were on the plane with us and I had to go up and introduce us and get the singers autograph for canowine. Wusses both of them! Plus I have to go listen to Mother Against Drunk Driving at night to, so I'm sure that'll be fun. Happy Humpday one and all!

Mom, Dad, Death

Last night traffic sucked driving home from my other job. I was going between 20-30 mph for I don't remember how long and stopping and going. I fell into a trance, perhaps it was because of the music I was listening to(an old mix CD) but I started thinking about my relationship with my parents and my son, and death. One of the songs was Ugly Kid Joe's version of Cats in the Cradle. I thought about how my dad and I were never close and how we should go to the bar when I go home and have a couple beers and talk. But I don't know really how to talk to him about how I feel and stuff. Then I thought about writing him a letter but that won't work. I mean what I want to say is far from bad, just let him know that even though we were never close, that I still love him and see alot of good traits that I have from him and wonder why mom got so mad at him at times and shit like that. Then I thought, what if he died and I never got to say all this shit to him. I'm sure he knows how I feel, like I said I am like him and he doesn't talk about shit like that and neither do I. BUt I feel that I should. Then I thought about KId Rock's My Oedipus Complex. Now I didn't really hate my dad like it talks about in this song, but dad was just impartial, he was just kind of there and then that song talks about "my son" actually here since it's not a popular song, here are the lyrics:

Kid Rock "My Oedipus Complex lyrics"

I need somebody won't u help me
I need somebody won't you tell me who I am
I need somebody please please help me
I need somebody u must tell me who I am
I've been livin a lie so long it seems I've lived a life time
If u could see what I feel it would make your ghetto lood like heaven
And I believe it stems down from my family situation
I never liked my old man
I couldn't stand to be around him
Sometimes I sit all alone just starin at his picture
My heart turns to stone and I think of this

You never loved me you never held me tight
instead u shook me like a beast to wake me up at night
u tried to make me think that your ways were best
when all I was was an outlet for all your stress

Life it's the ultimate sin
A game with no rules that you're expected to win
My personal hell's hidden with a grin
"Dad take the stand and let the trial begin"
U said that oil and water don't mix though it seems cool
Keep with your own and don't fuck up our gene pool
U should've went to school like your bigger brother
but you played the fool with a different color
Runnin' ship with a whip
I tried to keep up but I kept getting tripped
Money made u so wise
how could u look thru my face and not see your own eyes
Do as i say and not as I do
but I can't cuz when I look in the mirror I see u
And oh the pain how it hurts
it was always your home and your business that came first
U said a man is as good as his word
but your mind was closed and mine never herd
They say the nut don't fall far from the tree
look at u then look at me...

U ain't nothin to me u've never been to me
And all u ever gave a damn about was money see
So now fuck u man you ain't shit to me
And it's the day that I die of this hate that I'm free
Now I know growin up son that it ain't always been easy
and I know at times I was not always there for you
We never spent much time just talkin or havin a good time
but understand growin up son I never had a dime
So I worked my ass off and I put myself thru college
and everything I have to this day u know I built it all
Oh I wish I could go back and change the years that's lost between us
I wish I could take back some of the things I said to you
Son I said I'm sorry...
Son I said I'm sorry but still u resent me so
Son I said I'm sorry and why do u resent me so

I always loved u I always cared for u
just never wanted U to go thru what I've been thru
I tried to raise my fuckin family just the best I know
and now I'm hated like the devil and for what I don't know

So then I started thinking about my son and how much of a bad father I am. Wondering how he's gonna think of me when he gets older. Now me being a bad father isn't really all my fault because she took him away from me, but I could make more of an effort to go home and see him and to call and try to talk to him more even though he doesn't talk for very long before getting distracted and wanting to go play. Then Ozzy's Mama I'm coming home came on and I thought about how much I really hated my mother growing up. Seriously she was a bitch and considered herself "queen bitch". But I do regret the things I've said to her and have a much better relationship with her and my dad now. I believe most of that is because I am in the military, when I moved out the day before my 18th birthday and even after I had my son, they still weren't really close with me, but when they found out I was joining and with the war starting they began reaching out more. I think they are proud of me, because I wasn't really doing anything while I was there and they don't want me to get stuck in a crappy job like them. Then I started thinking about their money problems and how much better they'd be if I died. Now I'm not talking suicide or anything but seriously if I died they would be set and so would my son. My parents have lived very sparingly and I know that if anything happened to me and that got the 400,000 well I think I have a percentage going to my son, which they'd probably give to the ex, I'm not too sure or if they'd hold it until he turned 18. Anyway my parents would be able to get rid of any debt and save money for my son's education and stuff. My mom and I discussed my death a couple months ago. I told her I wanted the cheapest shit they could do. Cremate me and throw me somewhere, actually I said to drag my body into the woods and leave me but she said she'd get in touble for that so then I said cremation. I can't conceive someone payin 10 grand or more for a box to put into the ground. The body is an empty shell of whatever that doesn't need to be preserved, not saying I wouldn't buy them for my parents or whatever, but I still think it's stupid. But it's odd when you realize how much better, not necessarily happier, but better some people lives would be without you. Then I thought of all the times I could have died, I have been pretty close a couple of times. Kind of eerie, it'll suck though when I go if it's after my life isn't worth that much and everyone will get nothing but a bill.

Boring weekend

My weekend was pretty good though I feel cheap and used. Friday night HB and I fell asleep trying to watch Charlie and the Chocolate factory. She had to wake up early for work, I went ahead to my other job since I had to get up anyway. At my other job I spent awhile blog surfing since I haven't done it for a while, I came across a good one by a boy who died about 6 months ago, Horace Finkle is a funny 13 year old who died in a car crash and is stuck wondering the earth. Good readings. Then Chris and I were supposed to have a guys night out which turned into sitting at his place watchin tv(his girl was there so it wasn't OUR time) then he made me drive him to IKEA to get some furniture and then we had to put it together before we could go out. SO we had some drinks while putting together bookshelves and dressers and then he wanted to finish watchin the movie on tv. After me nagging and bitching, at midnight we went and played pool for about an hour while having a couple more drinks. I won a couple games and then I almost got kicked out right after we got our check, I had to do something to keep me entertained. Apparently you can't wear stocking hats in Champions, so when we got our check I put my hat back on and a bouncer guy started walking towards us and then Chris gave the waiter the check and we started walking out. Bouncer guy just walked to the waiter and probably asked if I was wearing the hat the whole time or something. We laughed at him and the stupidity that you can wear a baseball cap turned whichever which way to represent the gang your in but I can't wear a skull cap that has flames on them, that keeps my head warm and my crazy hair unknown to the world. Fuck them all in their stupid nazi asses! We went back to his place watched some more tv, I passed out and woke up snuggling with a big stuffed purple hippo. I don't think I tried to molest it but I may have a case of sexomnia. Sunday I spent the day with HB just being lazy, watching tv at my place and then going to hers where I helped her clean house, she kept telling me to stop, even though I helped dirty the place and the dishes. Some of those dishes were RANKASSHIT! My attempted chocolate covered strawberries that were in a tubaware was the first nastiness, my god that made me wanna puke, then Gabe had some sippies that at one time held milk in them. Everytime I couldn't help but make a sound and a face and she'd turn and just laugh at me. It wasn't really funny, It was stinky! Then we laid in bed and talked for a while, I really like that, we just lie there and talk about random things about our past or whatnot. And now I'm here on a Monday, got my checkout sheet, need to go around and tell everyone I'm fucking out of here. Wednesday is my going away lunch which no one will probably show up to except for a few and my office, which I am completely fucking fine with. I don't want people to show up just for food and pretend to be my friends. Thusday is officially my last day here and I will be walking through the halls naked with lipstick on my ass telling everyone to put their lips there!

Emails from last year

I'd like to share with everyone a collection of emails about last years holiday party, it was a little stressful but it seemed to work out for everyone in the end.

MEMO TO ALL EMPLOYEES
RE: Christmas PARTY ON DEC. 23RD
DATE: DEC. 1ST

I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23, starting at noon in the banquet room at Luigi's Open Pit Barbecue. No-host bar, but plenty of eggnog! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols...feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00 P.M. Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time, however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets. This gathering is only for employees! A special announcement will be made by our CEO at that time!

Merry Christmas to you and your family.

Patty


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FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: December 2
RE: Holiday Party

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees.

We recognize that Chanukah is an important holiday which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on we're calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to employees who are celebrating Kwanzaa at this time. There will be no Christmas tree present. No Christmas carols sung. We will have other type of music for your enjoyment.

Happy now?

Happy Holidays to you and your family.

Patty


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FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: December 3
RE: Holiday Party

Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table ... you didn't sign your name. I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only"; you wouldn't be anonymous anymore. How am I supposed to handle this? Somebody?

Forget about the gifts exchange, no gifts exchange are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too much money and executives believe $10.00 is very little for a gift. NO GIFTS EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED.


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FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
To: All Employees
DATE: December 7
RE: Holiday Party

What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20 begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours. There goes the party! Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs. Perhaps Luigi's can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party — the days are so short this time of year — or else package everything for take home in little foil swans. Will that work?

Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Overeaters Anonymous to sit farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women will get the table closest to the restrooms. Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with Gay men, each will have their own table. Yes, there will be flower arrangement for the Gay men's table. To the person asking permission to cross dress, no cross dressing allowed though. We will have booster seats for short people. Low-fat food will be available for those on a diet. We cannot control the salt used in the food we suggest for those people with high blood problems to taste first. There will be fresh fruits as dessert for Diabetics, the restaurant cannot supply "No Sugar" desserts. Sorry!

Did I miss anything?

Patty


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FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: December 8
RE: Holiday Party

So December 22 marks the Winter Solstice...what do you expect me to do, a tap-dance on your heads? Fire regulations at Luigi's prohibit the burning of sage by our "earth-based Goddess-worshiping" employees, but we'll try to accommodate your shamanic drumming circle during the band's breaks. Okay???

Patty


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FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
To: All Employees
Date: December 9
RE: Holiday Party

People, people, nothing sinister was intended by having our CEO dress up like Santa Claus! Even if the anagram of "Santa" does happen to be "Satan," there is no evil connotation to our own "little man in a red suit." It's a tradition, folks, like sugar shock at Halloween or family feuds over the thanksgiving turkey or broken hearts on Valentine's Day.

Could we lighten up? Please????????? Also the company has changed their mind in announcing the special announcement at the gathering. You will get a notification in the mail sent to your home.


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FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All #%&$**@ Employees
DATE: December 10
RE: The %#*&^%@*%^Holiday Party

I have no #%&*@*^ idea what the announcement is all about. What the %#&^!@ do I care...I KNOW WHAT I AM GOING TO GET!!!!!!!!!!!! You change your address now and you are dead!!!!!!!!!!!! No more changes of address will be allowed in my office. Try to come in and change your address, I will have you hung from the ceiling in the warehouse!!!!!!!!!!!

Vegetarians!?!?!? I've had it with you people!!! We're going to keep this party at Luigi's Open Pit Barbecue whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death," as you so quaintly put it, and you'll get your #$%^&*! salad bar, including hydroponic tomatoes. But you know, they have feelings, too. Tomatoes scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them scream right now! > HA !

I hope you all have a rotten holiday! Drive drunk and die, you hear me!!!!!!!!!!!

The Bitch from HELL!!!!!!!!


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FROM: Terri Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director
DATE: December 14
RE: Patty Lewis and Holiday Party

I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery from her stress-related illness and I'll continue to forward your cards to her at the sanitarium. In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay.

Happy Holidays!

Friday short, or short Friday

We did get some snow last night, and had a 2 hour delay for work! I was hoping they would cancel, like a little kid I kept calling to hear them say that work was cancelled, which it wasn't. So HB and I went out and cleaned off our carsand threw snowballs at each other, I almost pulled that scene from Dumb and Dumber and tackled her and buried her face in the snow but I thought that would give her yet another reason to stab me, so I didn't. I've decided that I'm not even going to put on my uniform today. I will sit here and bullshit listening to my music loud since not many people are here and I will probably leave early. I am starving! Ok so short post so I can go get some MCD's.

Pearl Harbor Day

I know most do not consider today an actual holiday, well I guess neither do I, I mean no present, no day off. Well I guess today is a day of rememberence that most people forget. On this day in 1941 the Japaneese attacked our small island of Oahu. 21 US Navy ships were sunk or destroyed and we lost approximately 2,403 lives in an attack that took less than 2 hours by 353 planes. Which sparked the US to join in the fight of World War 2 and also 4 years later towards the end gave us a reason to drop not one but 2 atomic bombs onto Nagasaki and Hiroshima. Teach the world not to fuck with the USA because we're some crazy ass kicking motherfuckers! They even made a nice little movie turning yet another tagedy into a love story(I still refuse to watch Titanic to this day) starring Ben Affleck, and to that I post this song.

Pearl Harbor by Team America

I miss you more then Michael Bay missed the mark
When he made Pearl Harbor
I miss you more than that movie missed the point
And that’s an awful lot girl
And now, now you’ve gone away
And all I’m trying to say is
Pearl Harbor sucked, and I miss you

I need u like Ben Affleck needs acting school
He was terrible in that film
I need u like Cuba Gooding needed a bigger part
He’s way better than Ben Affleck
And now all I can think about is your smile
and that shitty movie too
Pearl Harbor sucked and I miss you

Why does Michael Bay get to keep on making movies?
I guess Pearl Harbor sucked
Just a little bit more than I miss you


This morning I participated in yet another "last" color guard detail where we raised and lowered the flag for Pearl Harbor. I unfortunatly forgot my shoes at home and had to sueeze my size 13 feet into Uncle Toms exra size 10 1/2 shoes which sucked ass but not as bad as Pearl Harbor.

I hate DC drivers

Here is another lovely post for me to bitch. These people can't fucking drive when the weather is 80* and fucking sunny, well if you throw a little rain or snow into the mix, people become fucking retards! It started snowing yesterday, I noticed it around 2, so I came inside and said I was leaving so I could get to my other job before all of said retards got on the road. Well apparently all of them heard me in my office and decided to do the same thing. SO it took me a little longer than usual to get to work even though the roads were nothing but wet. On my way home from work there wasn't too many people on the road which was great! Everyone thought we were getting a huge blizzard or something and were off the roads, except for a few morons. Now here's the people I hate I think more than anyone. Ok let me set the scene for all of you. 4 lanes on the road, few cars on it, speed limit 55, I am cruising around 80 (going slower because of the snow) I'm in the far left lane and there is a car in front of me doing 55-60. There is no one in the lane next to us, I come up on his ass and wait for him to get out of my way. I get right on his ass because he is just fucking cruising in the fucking left lane when the other 3 lanes are clear, the left lane is for passing and fast cars(or minivans). All I can do is pass them on the right and give them an evil ass eye as I pass them. It should be legal for me to carry a gun when I drive and whenever anyone encounters fucking idiots like that, when you are forced to pass on the right, to shoot out their tire forcing them to pull on to the shoulder where I can go up and cut open their stomach and pull out their intestines and wrap it around their neck a couple times and then tie to my bumper, and then drive to a hospital preferably 10-20 miles away where they can receive a blood transfusion to keep them alive long enough so I can beat them with some sort of blunt after I pour gasoline inside their open stomach and light them on fire. This need to be a standard practice by all of America, then people will learn to be better drivers, I mean if they want to go slow by all means, just do it in the fucking right lane. Read the fucking signs all over. "Slower Traffic Keep Right"! Maybe if I start doing this I could be a hero of sorts! A pioneer in vigilantism! I need to go get a gun, don't tell my probation officer though I don't think I'm allowed to have one, I need to get a costume made too!

My Hot date with Hot Brownie!

SO yesterday was my hot date. I'll share some background info. While she was in Texas we talked on the phone alot late at night. I'd stay up way past my bedtime even though I had to get for work early talking with her for 2 hours or more at a time. One night we were playing 20 questions and she brought up a question about fantasy, I being half asleep and was probably drinking too gave a typical guy answer that I need not repeat, I still feel like an ass for saying. Well after an hour or so I ran out of questions so I asked her the same. She told me about this wonderful night. I thought about it and thought I could pull it off, I believe I even said something about it and she said stuff like that doesn't come true. Well when things continued going good when she returned I decided to make it a reality. I kept planning and tried not to leak too much info to her even though I was extremely excited and it was hard. I attempted to get most things ready though it was hard because I wanted to be with her at night. Well I probably shouldn't have stayed over on Friday night because that gave me very limited time to prepare Saturday. After I left her place around 8am, I had to run to Walmart and get a bed(air matress) and some more candles, a toliet seat(my fat ass broke mine somehow) and a few other things, run by the grocery store to get some last minute things including strawberries and to the flower shop to get the rose petals. I finally got home around 10, that gave me 2 hours to clean, cook, inflate bed and arrange rose petals, and candles, and change toliet seat. I fixed toliet, attempted to make chocolate covered strawberries but the chocolate didn't cooperate and I was frustrated and running low on time so I poured the thick ass chocolate onto the strawberries and threw them in the fridge, blew up the bed and arranged the candles. She called and said she'd be over in an hour. SO I started cooking, the lasangna actually came out really good. I arranged the rose petals and put the CDs I made in the right places. I searched and found what qualified as "romantic songs" and made 2 CDs 1 for the living room for dinner and one for the bedroom...lol. I at noon everything was done and I made the plates and sat them in the living room and got a chance to sit and smoke a cigarette. I called to see where she ws and she was just pulling up. She came in and the food had gotten a little cold for sitting out but she didn't seem to mind. The strawberries looked like a disaster but thankfully I had her favorite ice cream as a backup. We talked and then I went to the bedroom, lit the candles and started the music and brought her in. The look on her face was pricless. She laughed at the cheesy first song on that CD being "Can't get enough of your love" by Barry White. Note to anyone attempting to plan something with rose petals, the bleed! Her fantasy included a bubble bath that I told her I didn't have time to go to Bath and Body works, but I was planning on doing the bath before the bedroom, now I know bath afterwards because it stains you clothes and body! It looked like a flower massacre after being rolled around on, thrown at each other, and some were even chewed up and spit out. All in all, I think I did a pretty good job, though now I will have to find a way to top myself. I always do too good at first and now don't know if I can top that but I will try. Oh yeah this was supposed to ba an all night thing but she wasn't comfortable leaving Gabe with someone overnight so I had to put aluminum foil over all my windows so it was dark and looked like night time. He are a few pics that I took before and the ones I got to take during...lol. Ok well nevermind, blogger isn't letting me up load them I may try tomorrow. Ok it's tomorrow... Blogger still won't let me so here they are from Hello.

Not bad for first time 

The Bed 

Dinner for 2 

My air matress and dresser, the only things in my Bedroom 

HB playing in her rose petals 

HB and me 

A Christmas Story

My aunt sends me all kinds of stupid emails, most refering to god and jesus and shit that I delete but luckily I opened this one by accident and read it. It was filarious and I figured I'd share this heart warming story with all of you.


'Twas the night before Christmas--Old Santa was pissed.
He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.
I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!

I've busted my ass for damn near a year,
Instead of "Thanks Santa"--what do I hear?
The old lady bitches cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money--The reindeer all fight.

Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that things would get better
Those assholes from the IRS sent me a letter,
They say I owe taxes--if that ain't damn funny
Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?

And the kids these days--they all are the pits
They want the impossible--Those mean little shits
I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yo's--No request for them,
They want computers and robots...they think - I'm IBM!

Flying through the air...dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
I'm quitting this job there's just no enjoyment
I'll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment.

There's no Christmas this year
now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde.
I'm going SOUTH for the season

Fake Monday

Yep this morning I had to resume getting my lazy ass up before dawn, good news is it's still Thursday, so tomorrow is Friday! I didn't get as many hours in at my other job as I really wanted to but enough that I should have a nice check on the 15th, added to my Navy paycheck which gives me a week to buy my Christmas presents before I go home. Thankfully I should be done here at this command by that time so I will be working more again for money after christmas and saving to trade in my piece of shit minivan that is about to collapse under me while driving. It seems everytime I go home I have problems with my vehicle that makes my drive fun as hell worrying about breaking down in the middle of nowhere with no one able to come get my ass. I am still going to Color Guard practice today even though I've already said that I was pretty much done with it, but it gets me out of the office and I get to hang with Uncle Tom, Chris, and my lovely HB who joined! Actually I have to go up for that here in a bit and need to get my smoke on before then so this is a short update. I am still alive thus far, Hope everyones day goes good!

Random thoughts with useless facts

The weather outside is warm as hell again! It is supposed to get up into the high 60s again today but today has high winds and thunderstorms. I thought I'd get a chance to sleep in a bit on this "vacation" but I guess not. Since yesterday I had to get up early to help canowine move, and this morning after HB went to work I tossed and turned for about an hour and a half before I got up took a shower and left. I didn't want to stop at my place because traffic was pretty good so now I am at my other job wearing the same clothes as yesterday and people are looking at me like I am a dirty bum, which I kind of am, but half these people only shower once or twice a week and it really shows(well smells) in the summer! So Fuck you people who keep looking at me! I don't have counseling today, my days moved to Wednesdays, since I am done with the "education" part and on to the "treatment" part. They tried to keep me with the new counselor but I said that I couldn't make it so swithed to another counselor who hopefully isn't as retarded. I've noticed that my mind has been jumping around again lately from thought to thought looking at the seveal subects in this so far. I really notice it here at work probably because its so fucking boring. Wow they have the airconditioning on in here, thats good considering I am wearing my sweatshirt from yesterday. anyway yeah. Heres some usless shit since I am unorganized. HB can call me out if the animal ones are wrong even though I just get them and pass them on...lol.

The smallest man ever was Gul Mohammed (1957-1997) of India, who measured 1 feet, 10 inches.

The Christmas season begins after sunset on December 24th and lasts until January 5th. This is also known as the Twelve Days of Christmas.

One billion seconds is about 32 years.

On April 4, 1974, John Massis of Belgium pulled two New York Long Island railroad passenger cars totaling 80 tons with a thick rope, with a small bit attached, using only his teeth.

In the movie "Babe", the piglet was played by over 30 different piglets they outgrew the part so quickly during the production of the film.

The world's longest hot dog was 1,996-foot wiener made by the Sara Lee Corp. for the 1996 Olympics.

Every single hamster in the United States today comes from a single litter captured in Syria in 1930.

An airplane mechanic invented Slinky while he was playing with engine parts and realized the possible secondary use for the springs.

The "Mexican Hat Dance" is the official dance of Mexico. (I thought it was "Livin La Vida Loca")

The word "Oral-B" is a combination of oral hygiene and the letter B, which stands for the word "better."

Male goats will pee on each other in order to attract mates.

Bernd Eilts, a German artist, turns dried cow manure into wall clocks and small sculptures. He is now expanding his business to include cow dung wrist watches.

P.S. I gave Karma another chance last night. I stopped at an ATM to get some cash and a guy came up to me and gave me a story about his truck having a slow gas leak and needed money, he only had a check and no one would cash it. I was ready to say my usual " I'm stuggling to get by right now" thing but then realized that things have been going good for me lately so why not. I gave him $40, he asked for my address so he could send me it back. I gave him that too. We'll see if I get anything back, the wierd thing is I am pretty sure I have heard the same story before, exactly, he even said he had a case of beer that he ws willing to give me, that I declined. HB just laughed when I told her. I said I'm probably going to end up mad because he lied. If he would just come up to me and said "hey can I have some money" I would have gave him a couple bucks and thought nothing of it. But lets see if this Karma thing works.

Quick Update

Hope everyone had a great long Thanksgiving weekend, mine is still kind of continueing depending on how you look at it. Thought I worked my other job on Friday, saturday and the rest of this week, I have been off from the Navy until this Thursday. What can I say, I could really use some extra cash for Christmas. Thanksgiving was great. HB cooked some awesome food, I would have thought she was an expert at it even though she kept saying that she didn't know how to cook that "white food". She had a little frustration that kind of left me speechless. I wanted to help somehow, but I didn't want to touch the food because I'd ruin it. Everytime I tried to help do something with the dishes she wasn't done with. Gabe was a little rowdy and I didn't want to make that worse or try to discipline him (lose/lose situation) so I just kind of hung around and tried to stay out of the way. Some friends came over, we ate, talked, watched some movies, and just lounged around. It was good times. Wednesday while driving to her place flurries started falling and I called HB to let her know, thankfully it wasn't falling up there, I drove as fast as I could because I wanted to see her reaction when she saw it. It held off up there for a while. I was watching a movie and she took a bath, I looked out and saw it and told her to come check this out, she thought I was talking about the movie but followed me. We went outside on the balcony. It was so cute. She was holding her arm out to feel it and was just in awe of it. growing up seeing it eveery year I guess it just seems of more of a burden to me than an actual experience. It was good. While I was at work Saturday she picked up a little something for me, that I wan't going to mention but she did on hers, and she let me take a pic... I have been trying to get some good pics of her and would like some of both of us but I don't think Gabe can aim the camera very good, so I can take with me when I go home next month for Christmas. I know I'm only going to be gone a week but I know already that I am going to miss her alot. I hate the fact that her and Gabe are going to be there alone for Christmas. Next weekend she gets her surprise that I have been planning for a while, it's not too much of a surprise anymore but I am attempting to cook a nice meal and some other stuff for her. She liked some greek food but I couldn't remember what it was so in my attempts to figure out what it was it became pretty evident that I was going to attempt to cook it. SO I am just going for lasangna since I know she like that. I have never made it before, it is going to be interesting. I need to clean my place some more, I finally did laundry last night. Shit was piling up. Well I guess I should actually start working and earning my money, so much for a quick update, oh well. Happy MOnday!

Giving Thanks

I thought about doing this before but HB did it and is calling me a copycat. Hopefully she won't yell at me again(just kidding honey!). I am trying to remember last Thanksgiving, I am pretty sure I ate Ramen or Mac and cheese and slept most of the day in the barracks. It was actually the first thanksgiving that I was away from my family I believe. I think this is going to be HB's first away from hers. I hope we have a good time. I hope it snows a bit like it's supposed to so I can see the look on Gabe and hers faces when that get to see it for the first time. Here are some of the things I am thankful for this holiday:

-Beautiful, healthy baby boy
-Family that may be odd but loving
-All my true friends
-Beautiful loving girlfriend who accepts my faults and appreciates what I try to do for her
-People who donated furniture to me
-Chris for being like a brother to me
-All the concerts I have seen this year
-My supervisor for letting me leave almost whenever I want
-My 7 day weekend coming up
-People picking up the tab for lunch or coffee
-Uncle Tom for haveing me over for beer and cooking excellent food
-Canowine for exposing me to new music that I sometimes dig
-The hard times that I thought would never end, for making me strong
-The good people who taught me that human kind still had more nice people out there
-My probation officer letting me miss counseling and drug tests to go home for Christmas
-My parents for helping me out when they can
-My great grandfather for giving me hope of being 80 and as active as him
-People I work with for giving me a laugh on a daily basis and also arguing with me
-The Navy for teaching me skills and paying me even when I am off!
-My other job for letting me come and go as I please
-The feeling I get while holding HB in my arms
-The little things that I notice but fail to fully appreciate (nature, art, music, ect.)
-Being alive and fairly healthy
-The freedon to say, do, act, and wear whatever the hell my little heart desires
-All the other things that I take for granted and sometimes overlook
-For the military, God, fate or whatever brought HB into my life!

Fake Friday again!

So Today is another fake friday, and not only for a 4 day weekend like most people, it will be a 7 day weekend for me! Ok so I may not be off completely for 7 days, I took the extra days off so I could work at my other job to make some extra cash for Christmas especially cuz this check is going to suck with me missing days because of my van and counseling and shit. My counseling should be changing, it was supposed to be 8 weeks of "education" then the rest(how ever long they keep me) in group. I will be sure to pick a day when group is with a different counselor since the new one sucks ass and changed the "education" to group on his own and is completely worthless. Turkeyday is tomorrow. I hope it's fun. I will be spending it with HB and a couple of her work-mates. I think it'll be fun. Though I guess I am going to have to be somewhat proper since one of them is bringing her father or something and is probably traditional so I can't go with my usual stained jeans and offensive t-shirt that I usually wear on special holidays. HB laughed at my plans for thanksgiving, I was going to have shake and bake pork chops, a bottle of Jim Beam, and thinking about it I'd probably have worn my boxers or naked depending on the temp in my apartment. Hey though it sounds better than how I spent Easter this year, refer to THIS post. I cooked some stir fry for HB last night, she claimed to like it, I thought it was OK, not the best I've made but then I didn't have time to marinate the meat in some beer and sauce overnight so what can I expect. I'm trying to read my book again since I have neglected it lately. I'd like to share a small piece(ok not that small) about comparisons that is witty and true:

"You're missing the point," she said. "What you're saying makes sense in theory, but not in practice. You're trying to compare apples and orange."

"Why do you keep saying that?" he asked in response. "Apples and oranges aren't that different, really. I mean, the're both fruit. Their weight is extremely similar. They both contain acidic elements. They're both roughly sperical. They serve the same social purpose. With the possible exception of a tangerine, I can't think of anything more similar to an orange than an apple. If I was having lunch with a man eating an apple and- while I was looking away- he replaced that apple with an orange, I doubt I'd even notice. So how is this a metaphor for difference? I could understand if you said 'That's like comparing apples and uranium,' or 'That's like comparing apples with baby wolverines,' or 'That's like comparing apples with the early work of Raymond Carver,' or 'That's like comparing apples with a hermaphroditic ground sloth.' Those would be valid examples of profound disparity. But not apples and oranges. In every meaningful way, they're virtually identical."

"you're missing the point," she said again, this time for different reasons.

-Chuck Klosterman from "Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs"

SIlverstein and Hawthorne Heights

Another great concert!! I am fucking dragging major ass today and am planning on going up and hiding to take a nap here in a little bit. SO the first band up last night was Aiden who sounded pretty good and I was diggin the fact they had a asian guy who had a righteous deep scream and they had a fat white guy with a mohawk. They all jumped in the crowd at one point or another. But turns out they were posers. I was thinking that when they came out, they dressed up to look "cool" while all the other bands just wore what they were probably wearing earlier. The lead singer had his face painted up and shitand when he talked he was talking to all the little kids, it was pretty annoying. He had the crowd holding his feet so he could stand on them while saying "look around these are your brothers and sisters" and stupid shit like that, his voice reminds me of My Chemical Romance and don't get me started on what I think of those pussy ass faggots.

Next was the remaining members of Bayside. The band rolled their van in Denver earlier this month killing their drummer and seriously injured their bass player. So they had their singer and guitarist. They came out and did a nice little acoustic set. I enjoyed it, I like shit like that but again it didn't belong at this type of show and some people were dicks and telling them to kill themselves and they suck and get off the stage. Granted most of these came from a group of little fucking privates that probably just got out of bootcamp. Little bitched migrated over by us and were just annoying little bitches. I thought it sounded pretty good and it did take balls knowing that alot of people wouldn't want to hear softer shit like that. I am now listening to what they sound like when not acoustic and it sounds pretty good. I may need to get the album.

Next up was Silverstein who kicked ass as always. By the end of the first song Chris, his girl and, me leading the way made it right up front, we didn't really get center this time but we weren't that far off to the side. They put on a great show as always filled with jumping screaming his amazing vocals! Shane Told came out to the crowd a little bit. At the end the singer from Aiden and giant twinkie came out and jumped into the crowd, the twinkie was right next to us and took the crowd down, Chris and I went down a little but not completely. It was a good time. Chris and I kept screaming for "Already Dead" but he said they could only play one more song and it wasn't Already dead but they are coming back in March or somewhere around there. I will probably be there! After their set I wanted to go get water but Chris said since we already had a good spot we should stay, so we did, even though I said I could get us back up there again. Oh yeah and I got like 2 pics and then put my camera in my pocket and when I pulled it back out the batteries fell onto the floor. So I may have one or two pics and thats it!

Hawthorne Heights was the headliner. It kind of pisses me off that Silverstein never headlines. But they put on a good show, all the little kids, especially the girls love them some Hawthorne. They broke their snare during the set so while they were fixing that, there was 2 little girls behind me asking to switch places so they could see, now if I didn't have a girl and they were older than 13 I may have considered but I turned around and saw little girl with braces and another that was really short but was giving me a dirty look so I said no. they kept persisting thinking that they could persuade me when they were really just annoying me and was going to cause me to have to be a dick, which I don't mind doing. SO I have one of my arms on CHris's shoulder like always and the other on another taller guy next to us. The little one kept trying to squeeze in between me and Chris I was so fucking close to elbowing her in the face, it was right there, but I didn't. She went to the other side of Chris and I watched her try to put all her weight, which may have been 75lbs, into Chris, we just laughed. But all in all it was a good show.

Afterwards I drove all the way up to HB's to sleep, I go in and she yelled at me for smelling like a bar and alcohol. I only had 2 drinks and a shit ton of smokes. and was sweaty as hell, I was soaked staying up their for 2 whole sets. SO I jumped in the shower, brushed my teeth and went to sleep. I am fucking cranky as shit, need coffee and food I am starving I worked up an appetite last night but couldn't get an after concert snack because I was trying to hurry so I could get to sleep. Today is Fake Thursday! Thank god. Today I am going home, getting groceries, go to counseling and then goin to sleep. Sorry HB I need my rest and I know if I go up there we won't be resting.

Damn Chris

SO yet another weekend has come to pass. Again it was pretty good. Friday night I went to my other job then came back to HBs house, we just watched some movies and went to bed early for once. Woke up the next morning and went back to my other job, I needed to try to make up some hours for all the days off I've been taking off. From there I went home for a little bit to try to get some more shit organized since I am never there. My landlord came up to fix my computer a bit since it has been messin up. I was supposed to go back to HBs but Chris called me and wanted me to go to this game night shit at one of his friends house. I thought "well I haven't hung out with him for a while" so I told him I'd call HB and let her know my change of plans. He starts giving me this guilt trip shit about him leaving soon and going to the sandbox and shit. I yelled at him for being an ass and called her. She asked if I'd be coming over after and I said that it probably depended on what time we left and whether or not we got drunk, she said ok and to give her a call later to let her know. Game night was pretty sucky. 3 tvs, 11 people playing. So you have a little square of the tv, played some Halo 2 and did pretty good, then Halo 1 and some other crappy games. Around 1030 I was asking when we were going to leave and he said not for a while. SO about 12 I called HB and told her I probably wouldn't come over, mainly because I didn't want her to have to keep her door unlocked while she is sleeping until I got there and then wake her up. Come to find out on SUnday when I went over there she had a little suprise that she was sleeping in, waiting for me!SO she shows me it and says "this is what you missed while you were out with your other girlfriend last night" (Chris and I discussed that I am the man of the relationship since I am taller, he has bigger boobs than me, plus he whines more). SO she's messin with me and giving me the brush off. I told her to hand me my phone, I called Chris and left him a voicemail telling him that I was going to puch him in the face when I saw him (I actually did punch him in the face in Vegas when he ruined it with all those 21 yr olds). He called back later and tried to talk to her and help me out. It didn't really work until later she did try it on for me, so I could see it. When I saw him this morning I balled up my fist but he asked if she put it on and I said yes a little bit, but not the stockings and he said it was close enough so I couldn't hit him. and then we made out I mean made up.

Tonight we(chris and I) are going to see Hawthorne Heights and Silverstein! It will be my 3rd time seeing both of them, Chris has only seen Hawthorne Heights once but Silverstein the same. We are stoked! Take out some agression by screaming until our voices are gone (HB and his girlfriend will be happy about that) and jumping around fighting our way to the front. It will be fun, it's the last concert that I have planned so far this year. Although I found Action Action, Men, Women and Children are playin in Bmore next month. I'd like to see action action again and canowine said men, women, and children were good. I think I heard a song or 2 that sounded pretty good. Also Funeral for a Friend are coming back next month and headlining so that would be cool too. Though I really need to save money for a new car and christmas presents. SO I probably won't go to any more unless a really good one comes since I always have to have a couple drinks and buy a tshirt. But I will try to take pics tonight and am pretty sure we can get close. If we can get front on UnderOaths sold out show, we should do pretty good since This show isn't sold out. Happy Monday, or at least it will be when I'm at the show!

Update* Show sold out!

New Bed

Yesterday they told me my van was a piece of shit and would cost around $800 to fix. I said no thanks if I am going to spend that much I might as well use it on a down payment on a car that I'd actually want. So I didn't have a way to pick it up until HB got off at 4 so I figured I night as well still not go to work, so she took me to get it and then we went to look for a bad cuz I am getting a little tired of sleeping on couches and the barracks bed I was sleeping on for a little over a year wasn't comfy at all. So we went to SticksNStuff and looked around. I wanted a queen sized most of them were a little more expensive than what I thought I was going to spend, then I saw a comfy king sized for cheaper than the queens. So I got it. The guy who attempted to tie it to the roof of my van was a complete retard who apparently has no clue on how to do a job that he is paid exclusively to do. The matress almost flew off a couple of times. I had to pull over 3 times on the way home to adjusted it. But now HB and I have a bed, I decided it should go in her apt since Gabe wouldn't have a room or anything at mine. It was nice to roll around on it last night, much more comfy than her couch. She laughed at me because my feet hang off the bed still, I told her I have grown used to it and actually enjoy when the tips of my feet hang off. We had all that space but yet still slept bundled up holding each other. I think she tried to escape my clutches but I scooted closer and held her anyway when she ran out of room to scoot. Now if I wake up and she is on the other side of the bed then I know she scooted to the edge and decided to go around to the other 5ft of bed. Fun times, everyone keeps distracting me and I need to run to the hospital to do some shit and get some food so I may post later.

Random Thursday shit

I am tired! Last night I tried a different way home from my other job that took a little longer probably because I almost got lost in DC but found my way home. It could have been the rain that made traffic suck, I don't know. SO I have one more route to really try to get home from there. My check is going to suck since I dropped my van off at the shop today to get fixed yet again, damn curbs need to stop hitting my van! So I am missing today possibly tomorrow I will go in on saturday, monday I have a concert and tuesday is counseling thats 4 days I worked this 2 week pay period. But I am at the mercy of HB to drive my bum ass around. Last night I went over there so we could drop my van off early this morning. I was trying to watch Radio since I haven't seen it yet while she was ironing her uniform. But I missed some parts and then we shut it off and went to bed before it was over. SO I will have to try to watch it another time. I need to have her run by my apt and get some clothes and shit so I will try to take a pic of my place or me or both to post for HNT since I have been lacking on that lately. We'll see, I want to get a couple pics of us together, maybe Gabe can take a pic of us...lol. I have another short notice color guard detail today. I am lead rifle yet again and Chris keeps telling me not to screw up, but I think I will on pourpose. Not really but it would be kind of funny. He said he can't get me on the Washington Capitols (hockey) detail which I already knew he wouldn't be able to. Oh well. I don't mind. People don't like me on it, except Chris and Tom. Thats only because they(everyone else) know I am better than them except last Friday. Lets see what else, I had a slew of thought to post about. I was going to post about lyrics but that will take some research that I don't really have time for. Listening to "my music" some lyrics make me think of things and sound sweet and shit and then the next line is the total opposite. One that is easy is how Hawthorne Heights (band I am seeing monday with Silverstein, will be the 3rd time I saw both of them) "Ohio is for Lovers" reminds me of my son. The lyrics "And I can't make it on my own. Because my heart is in Ohio." but not well anymore of the song "So cut my wrists and black my eyes. So I can fall asleep tonite and die. Because you kill me. You know you do, you kill me well. You like it too, and I can tell. You never stop until my final breath is gone. You know you do, you kill me well. You like it too, and I can tell. You never stop until my final breath is gone." But whatever, thats the case for almost all songs from the bands I listen to. Kind of like me jump from one thing to another and most of them are about pain and revenge. But I will find more of that perhaps saturday when I am "working" at my other job for as long as I can stand being there to get more hours on this paycheck. HB keeps saying shit to me in spanish and then doesn't tell me it's translation, last night before we went to sleep she said something about tomorrow and question but I can't remember exactly what all she said. I tried telling her that she has to at least give me the translation too or else I won't learn. Perhaps I will by a translator dictionary. Especially when I don't have a computer to plug everything into, or maybe I will carry a notebook and pen so I can write it down and look it up the next day. Te quiero y espere que esta sensación dure por siempre!

Algunas buenas vendas nuevas

Our last Night

Bring me the Horizon

Hopedieslast

Test Icicles

Broken Daylight

Email Survey

So I thought I may try to make eveyone sick. HB sent me this email survey that I had to fill out about her and she had to fill out about me. SO here are the answers.

This is funny. YOU fill in the blanks about ME and send it back to ME.But first send a blank one out to all your friends, including me, so we can return the favor to you. Be honest --they're really SCARY to get back. It only takes a few minutes, so just do it!!!!

1st: Send (forward) this Survey to everyone you know to see how well heor she knows you.

2nd: (reply) Fill this survey out about the person who sent it to you and send it back to them.

Her's about me:

Your name: *EDITED HB*
Where did we meet: CFC...color guard practice?
Take a stab at my middle name: Lee....the flea..lol...
Do I believe in God: Uhm, no..but you say Jesus loves you at concerts
How long have you known me: Like a month or so.
Do I smoke: Yes, more than I do.
What was your first impression of me upon meeting: WHO IS THAT?!
Color of my eyes: Beautiful blue, with little yellow and light brown spots...
Do I have any siblings: No, that's why you're spoiled.
What's one of my favorite things to do: Be shy? Be with your other girlfriends, damn player!
Do you remember one of the first things I said to you: You need to be in the Color Guard.
What's my favorite type of music: Mostly alternative, punky music. (and it's not pop rock, whore!)
What is the best feature about me: Your eyes...I could fall into them. They're like Ocean eyes...
If you could change on thing about me, what would it be: Uhm, not too much..I like everything about you and accept who are..Well maybe your style...you could always use some of that...
Am I shy or outgoing: Shy, but way more shy than me.
Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules: You've always been a rebel, but now you wanna follow the rules.
What's your favorite memory of me: Us at the field trip, how you kept looking at me like you wanted to kiss me, but couldn't...
Any special talents: Ha ha ha....Mrs. Sprinkles loves you.
Would you consider me a friend: Yeah, almost my best right now.
If there was one good nickname for me, what would it be: Bish.
If you and I were stranded on a desert island, what one thing would I bring: Uhm, you're computer...and good music...maybe Aaron...but he's not a thing...like you said.

What I said about her:


Your name: Randy
Where did we meet: work (really got to know each other on field trip)
Take a stab at my middle name: none anymore (forgot what it used to be)
Do I believe in God: Yes
How long have you known me: 26 days, 10 hours, 40 minutes, and 41
seconds That I haven't screwed up with HB
Do I smoke: Yes
What was your first impression of me upon meeting: Wow, she's beautiful
Color of my eyes: Brown
Do I have any siblings: Yes
What's one of my favorite things to do: spend time with son, and now boyfriend too
Do you remember one of the first things I said to you: Hey can I bum a smoke
What's my favorite type of music: everything but kind of into pop rock right now
What is the best feature about me: personality and well everything else!
If you could change on thing about me, what would it be: give you a happier past, perhaps to not have gotten married
Am I shy or outgoing: shy just like me
Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules: somewhat of a rebel
What's your favorite memory of me: kissing you and looking into your eyes and seeing you smiling and softly biting your lip
Any special talents: Possibly haven't found out yet
Would you consider me a friend: more than a friend, a lover
If there was one good nickname for me, what would it be: Hot Brownie
If you and I were stranded on a desert island, what one thing would I bring: would you bring, tough one, I would say your son but he's not a thing, so I will have to go with either a bed or music.

She also sent this to Tio Thomas, Here is what he put for her, since he doesn't know much about her:


Your name: Tomas
Where did we meet: en el autobus
Take a stab at my middle name: Guadalupe
Do I believe in God: Si
How long have you known me: cuatro semanas
Do I smoke: Si
What was your first impression of me upon meeting: bonita
Color of my eyes: marrón
Do I have any siblings: Si
What's one of my favorite things to do: dormirse
Do you remember one of the first things I said to you: Hola
What's my favorite type of music: Salsa
What is the best feature about me: pelo
If you could change on thing about me, what would it be: Nada
Am I shy or outgoing: tímido
Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules: rebelde
What's your favorite memory of me: sonrisa
Any special talents: No
Would you consider me a friend: Si
If there was one good nickname for me, what would it be: bizcocho de chocolate
If you and I were stranded on a desert island, what one thing would I bring: hijo

What a racist prick, he felt the need to not only be a smartass but one trying to be one en espanol. Well hey there Tio Thomas, Puta donde esta mi pollo.

Useless Facts for Humpday

Counseling was boring as shit last night, I kept dozing off during it. Nothing really interesting. I stayed at my apartment which I think makes the second time I've slept there since I've moved in, maybe the third. I am getting sick again, feels like the same thing I had the first weekend I hung out with HB, I felt like ass, fuckin flu shot! But here's some stupid fact for all to memorize, there will be a test at the end of the year on all useless facts posted so you guys better be studying.

The largest diamond that was ever found was 3106 carats.

The largest diamond found in the United States was a 40.23 carat white diamond. It was found in 1924 and nicknamed the "Uncle Sam."

In Israel, religious law forbids picking your nose on Sabbath.

Director George Lucas had trouble originally getting funding for Star Wars because most studios thought most people wouldn't bother seeing it.

Australia has had stamps that actually look like gems. In 1995 and 1996 they used a special technology to make the stamps look like diamonds and opals.

The Bible was written by over 40 authors over a period of 1500 years.

American actor Jack Nicholson, and American singer Bobby Darrin were raised believing their grandmothers were their mothers and their mothers were their older sisters.

A Singapore singing group by the name of "The Oriental Singers," sang non-stop for 74 hours and five minutes.

The longest engagement lasted 67 years, and the couple ended up marrying when they were 82 years old.

The amount of aluminum that Americans throw out in three months is enough to rebuild all American commercial planes.

A pigs orgasm lasts up to 30 minutes.

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would produce enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

The USA Forest Service has built more than 360,000 miles of various kinds of roads in national forests -- or eight (8) times the entire length of the U.S. interstate highway system.

Water expands 9% when it is frozen.

The number of people alive on earth right now is higher than the number of all the people that have died. Ever. (Not Possible, I think, still looking)

The average American consumes 1.2 pounds of spider eggs a year and eat 2.5 pounds of insect parts a year.

Abe Lincoln bought 50 cents worth of cocaine in 1860.

Screw this Mickey Mouse Horse Shit

This post is going to be dedicated to Uncle Tom and Canowine who think that I have lost my evilness.This post may freak out HB but I have to take it to the extreme to make up for the lovey stuff. SO here I sit trying to think of things that really piss me off. Obviously Jessica Lynch got me going the other day and traffic really pissed me off last night. It took me an hour and 45 minutes to get from my other job to my apartment, a trip that usually takes about 40 minutes. Why did it take me so long, no fucking clue other than every driver on that particular road at that exact time were complete fucking morons who deserved to have their heads beat in with some sort of blunt object. I'd prefer to use a brick so that I can feel the splatter of the grey matter of the brains onto my knuckles. There is no fucking reason why the far left lane should be stopped when there is no accident. It should always be moving at least the fucking speed limit, but no it was a dead stand still. Then we would get up to almost 25mph and then stop again. This went on for about 10 miles and that took about an hour. Tomorrow I am going to try to take a different route back to my apt. It's pretty much going through DC which I thought would suck but after last night I am willing to try to see if it is any better than the fucking beltway. I was half tempted to drive on the shoulder screaming obsenities at all the cars who may not have been to blame but were still in my way and there for guilty of pissing me off. Then you get the fuckers who leave 4 car spaces between them and the car in front of them because they are afraid of rear ending them if they make a quick stop at 15MPH!! they have all this space and the car in front touches their brakes to slow down and the car with all this distance that is right in front of you locks up their brakes like they were going 220. Fucking idiots. Thats when I really want to pull in front of them slam on my brakes and get out, throw them on the shoulder and run them over with their own car and park it on top of them because neither of them need to be on the road or the planet for that fucking matter. How the fuck do these people get their licsence here? You have to take a moron test and have an IQ less than your shoe size or be fucking blind. Then you get the fuckers who ride the line. I ride the line right next to them and hope that they hit my van. I can use a paint job or something, not like I really give a shit about the damn thing. I kind of want to figure a way to total it and not get hurt so I can get a new car. But thats another sceme, I mean story. Fuckers, I get right next to them and just stare at them, I'll probably end up getting shot doing this, I do have a bullet proof vest in my van I just may need to bring it from the back seat up and possibly wear it when I drive. Damn I need a smoke now after all that bitching. I may start a list of things that piss me off here so that I can go off about them every once in a while, thanks to Uncle Tom for the title of this post. Now Fuck Off!